


Mirror, Mirror On the Wall

by Elialys



Category: Fringe
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-03-22
Updated: 2014-07-16
Packaged: 2017-11-02 09:11:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 31,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/367355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elialys/pseuds/Elialys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is how it started: One night, a hotel room, two Olivias. One of them was drunk, the other was not. Set early season 4.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this story after 4x02 'One Night In October' when Peter was still completely nonexistent. You gotta love O².

If there was someone Olivia did not expect to see standing on the other side of her hotel room's door when she looked through the peephole at 2.30am, it was her Alternate. She was even more taken aback when she opened the door, and a simple look at her face was enough to let her know that she was _drunk_.

It was all so very wrong. Yet again, everything felt wrong right now.

Olivia was in the wrong place, literally speaking, forced to function in a Universe that wasn't her own; even her room felt off, details all over the place reminding her of the fact that this wasn't her world, that she shouldn't be here. She didn't want to be here. She doubted she would ever stop feeling irked whenever she was Over There, knowing how she had spent her first trip here, a year ago.

Being kidnapped and held captive in a dark room for two months tended to mark you for life.

But as usual, she didn't have a choice when it came to her work or wherever it took her, especially now that the Bridge was functional. One thing that was _not_ exactly functional on the other hand was her relationship with this other Olivia. Not that she wanted it to be. She had been somewhat grateful for the fact that the Fringe Division being what it was here, they weren't forced to share a hotel room, like it would have been the case Over Here; the government still didn't exactly give them a lot of money on their side.

Olivia never slept well in hotel rooms, if she slept at all, and these past few weeks, sleep had become even more challenging than before, due to the peculiar things she was seeing in her dreams. It wasn't so much the dreams themselves, which were truthfully quite enjoyable, but rather how she felt upon awaking.

That was why she hadn't really tried to sleep at all tonight, knowing that she was too restless to even try anyway. And as she usual, she was depressingly _lonely_. She was lonely, and she knew that dreaming would only soothe her for so long, before she was left feeling empty again. That feeling had only worsened when she had briefly thought about going down to the bar and get a drink with…

That's where the thought had stopped, and the absence of a name she couldn't place and a face she couldn't fully remember had stung, like it always did, that gaping hole never giving her any respite. It was throbbing harder than ever tonight, as if being here, in this place, such a wrong place, reminded her of something she _should_ know, but didn't.

Facing her Alternate in the middle of the night, an _inebriated_ Alternate, was not something she felt like dealing with right now, and she was irritated before she even said a single word.

"Can I come in?" Liv casually asked then, remarkably steadily, though one of her hands was now grabbing the doorframe, as if to keep herself from slumping too much.

Olivia knew she didn't usually drink; it was one of the many traits she had catalogued in her head as being ' _the things she herself did/didn't do, and which ultimately made her more flawed than her Alternate'_.

Said Alternate was doing a pretty good job at not looking or sounding too drunk, despite her lack of habit in doing so, but Olivia knew what she looked like after too many drinks; that was a look she had seen in the mirror once too many times in her life.

Her first impulse was to close the door in her face. But as she stared at her, she noticed other signs, beside her glassy eyes and other alcohol induced symptoms, little things that were all very wrong, and very unusual. The rim of her eyes were actually red, as if she had cried, but Olivia pushed the though away. This Olivia did not cry, this Olivia was less emotionally driven, or at least not as openly.

Because of their forced collaboration, she had now –reluctantly- spent too many hours working by her side, and was being reminded way too often of the fact that, at the core, they were irrefutably the same.

She hated it, hated that sometimes, she couldn't ignore the obvious truth…that they were both Olivia Dunham.

It was so much easier to ignore it, when their differences shone as brightly as the contrast of their hair.

Right now, though, Liv looked very much like herself on a very bad day, which was just as wrong as everything else. It was suddenly dawning on Olivia that up until now, she had never seen her with her guard down, and wouldn't have minded keeping it that way, to be honest. But it was too late.

Now she was intrigued –not to mention aggravated by the fact that _she_ had gotten drunk when they were supposedly still on duty.

That was why she didn't close the door, not right away anyway, saying disapprovingly: "You're drunk."

Liv shrugged, a coy smile on her lips. "So?"

"You don't drink," Olivia specified, not appreciating the carefree attitude she was already choosing to display –as usual, and yet unable not to know that it was a defensive demeanor like any other.

Liv chuckled then. "What are you, my mother?"

The resentment that was never very far whenever she talked with her Alternate spiked just then, changing her slight irritation into real annoyance. They were both aware of the fact that there was only one Marilyn Dunham still alive and that, _as usual_ , Olivia was not the lucky daughter in that case.

And so she crossed her arms in front of her chest, straightening up, an unconscious gesture –or not- to look taller than her, who was now pretty much slouching against the doorframe.

She was not going to give in and enter her game.

"No, I'm not your mother, but I'm part of your team," she told her coldly. "What would happen if Colonel Broyles called right now and said we needed to be out on the field in fifteen minutes?"

Liv cocked her head, pursing her lips in a fake, contemplative smirk. "Well, I guess I would have to let you drive my car."

That was about enough for Olivia. Despite the fact that she woudn't sleep, she was tired, _exhausted_ really, her nerves raw from this inexplicable feeling still weighting her down; she had no time for the drunk woman, and no amount of curiosity was worth being mocked with that smile at 2 freaking 30 in the morning.

She made to close the door without even one last word, only her famous glare, but Liv blocked it with her foot, and then with her whole body, almost embracing the wood, as if she was trying to force her way into room. But Olivia had the upper hand; she was the one pushing it close, and had full use of her coordination skills…unlike her.

That's how Liv ended up pretty much squashed between the door and the frame, her face very close to hers; she didn't even make a noise when Olivia kept on putting pressure on the door a little longer than necessary, even though it had to be painful.

Her smile was gone, though, and for a second, Olivia thought she saw a glimpse of what had led to drink in the first place in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Liv said then, honestly. "I'll try and keep my mouth shut. I just…I don't want to be alone anymore right now, or I might drink myself into a coma." Her face was really close, so close that Olivia could see every detail in her eyes, and she became quite certain then that she _had_ to have been crying at some point earlier. She knew these signs. "Let me in?" Pause. "Please."

She did not let her in, but she lifted her weight off the door so that Liv wasn't crushed anymore –and to put some distance between them. She still kept it mostly closed, now narrowing her eyes at her Alternate.

"Why come to my room, though?" She asked her suspiciously. "Your Lincoln is in the building, too, and I'm sure he'd be delighted to take care of your drunken self."

And that was an understatement. From what Olivia had witnessed so far, the man was completely crazy about the red-haired woman. Why, she really didn't know.

Even though she seemed generally oblivious to her partner's smitten looks, Liv must have been aware of it on some level at least because she smiled then, and it wasn't mocking or any kind of annoying. It was actually slightly giddy. "Let's just say that if I went to Lincoln's room right now, knowing him and knowing myself, I'd probably end up in his bed. I figured it was less likely to happen with you."

The way she stared at Olivia as she said these words was actually rather conflicting with what she was saying, and not for the first time, Olivia found herself feeling suddenly extremely self-conscious under her Alternate's gaze, in a way she did not like to feel when it came to her.

She was probably making things up, being her paranoid self…but there were only so many meanings to these kind of looks, were there?

More to put an end to her stare and the awkwardness it was causing her to feel than anything else, Olivia moved away from the door, then, letting her come in. She heard her close the door, but gave herself a few seconds to compose herself, fighting the urge to run a hand through her hair –she knew she was still being watched, and was all too aware of the fact that her every move could easily be deciphered by her present company.

She wished she didn't feel the constant need to appear strong and in control in front of her Alternate, but she couldn't exactly help it.

She eventually turned around, wrapping her arms in front of her chest again to keep her hands still. Liv hadn't moved, now leaning tiredly against the door, still staring at her indeed. Olivia fully took her in for the first time tonight, noting the way she was dressed…which was pretty much the way she herself had dressed for 'sleep', with comfy pants and an old shirt. While her own attire was black and grey, Liv's pants were white, her shirt a light, faded blue.

Generally speaking, she definitely looked worn out and disheveled, as if she hadn't been getting much sleep either; it was very odd to see her out of her work clothes, lacking her usual assertive aura. It wasn't that she looked nervous or anything of the sort –Olivia doubted this woman ever felt any kind of nervousness even when she didn't have alcohol running through her veins, but she definitely looked…less assured.

Their opposite postures still screamed of how different they could be, though, one of them standing straight and tensed, arms crossed, while the other was almost casually and tranquilly leaning against the door, hands loosely joined in front of her.

"What's wrong with you?" Olivia asked then, bluntly.

Liv raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean, what's wrong with me?"

Olivia held onto her elbows to keep her hands from coming up again, determined to keep a collected demeanor. The annoyance was definitely still there, though. She had to keep herself from sighing as well.

"You decided to get drunk tonight, despite the fact that you don't usually drink, and then you came _here_. There has to be something."

Liv shrugged. "I didn't come here to talk about my problems; I was more hoping for a distraction."

And there was that smile again, and that look, and Olivia's nostrils flared. "It's 2.30 in the morning," she told her with a scowl. "I'm that close to calling Lincoln and asking him to come deal with you, since apparently, he'd be able to distract you. Either you tell me what's upsetting you so much that you had to come to _my_ room, or you get out."

Amazingly, Liv averted her eyes then, now scowling too. "You're gonna think I'm nuts," she muttered.

Olivia chuckled humorlessly, and the other woman looked back up at her. "We are _alternate_ versions of each other, standing in the same room. Try me. I'm sure I can keep an open mind."

Liv tilted her head shortly, though a bit sloppily, admitting that she had a point. She still remained quiet for another long moment, now nibbling on her lip, eyes lost in the distance. When she finally spoke again, she still didn't look at her.

"Ever since the Bridge was created I've been…" She stopped, looking frustrated, one of her hands now raised in front of her, palm up. "I dunno how to explain it. I've been feeling like…like something's off, or missing, and lately I've been having dreams, and hearing…stuff."

Olivia's entire body had tensed upon hearing her words, her breath even stopping briefly in her throat. And it wasn't caused by the fact that her Alternate was telling her that they were basically experiencing the same things, no, far from it. It was caused by sudden and pure anger, which was melding with mortification.

She couldn't believe she had fallen for this.

"You've talked to Lincoln, haven't you?" She asked her then, her voice icy and low, still trying to contain her emotions, though it was becoming incredibly hard. "The Lincoln from my side."

Liv finally met her eyes again, looking startled and confused, as if not understanding her sudden rage. "What?"

But Olivia wasn't going to be fooled any longer. She had known this woman couldn't be trusted, and yet she had let her in her room, had even been ready to listen to her on some level.

"The two of you talked, didn't you? He told you what _I_ told him, and you decided it would be _fun_ to mess with me a little more."

She had started pacing now, unable to stop herself, staring at her Alternate with a deathly glare, and Liv's confusion only worsened.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," she said with a small, baffled chuckle. "I've only spoken to your Lincoln twice, and you were there during both cases, remember?"

"Don't lie to me," Olivia said crossly, still pacing, ignoring the fact that she surely looked like some kind of angry animal. "You're always trying to find ways to piss me off, but this is…you've gone too far."

Liv raised both hands in fake surrender, still looking perplexed. "Why the hell do you think I'm always trying to piss you off?"

"Because you _are_ ," Olivia almost snapped, stopping abruptly. "Don't pretend you don't like rubbing it in my face, how you stole my life and fooled all my friends."

Liv pursed her lips then, before shrugging a shoulder, slumping back against the door. "Alright," she admitted, without any trace of remorse. "Maybe I do enjoy pissing you off."

It was Olivia's turn to be slightly taken aback, not expecting an admission from her. "Why?" She couldn't help asking, her heart still pounding.

Liv shrugged again. "I don't know. You're just always so…tensed and closed up. When you're mad, you get all flushed and flustered. I like it."

That was an answer Olivia truly hadn't seen coming –though admittedly, she couldn't say she was completely surprised by the way she was staring at her again. To add to her aggravation, she could feel the burning sensation on her cheeks increase, proof that she was indeed blushing; she still did her best to keep a straight face on, despite the fact she really couldn't think of anything to say in reply to her confession.

Eventually, surely deciding that she had created enough awkward tension between them, Liv spoke again, still refusing to blink. "I am not trying to piss you off tonight, though. I'm not lying. Your Lincoln hasn't told me anything at all, and I've really been hearing…"

Olivia held her gaze, hardly convinced. One thing for sure, she was not going to help her spit it out, whatever it was. She seemed to realize that, because she said:

"I've been hearing a…baby. A crying baby."

Alright. She hadn't expected that one either.

She sure did not expect the look that crossed her Alternate's face after saying these words. She watched as she closed her eyes, her face constricting briefly, breathing sharply as if trying to contain some intense emotion, shaking her head slightly.

"And it doesn't make any sense," Liv half-muttered, half-whispered, as if talking to herself. "I don't even like kids in the first place. I've never really been around babies, but every time I hear those cries I…"

One of her hands was up to her chest now, clenching her shirt in a tight fist. When she realized what she was doing, she let go and dropped her hand, lifting her head again to look at her, offering her a fake smile. Olivia didn't fail to notice that her eyes looked watery again.

"Hence the drinking," Liv concluded, forcing herself to sound casual, and doing a pretty good job at it. "It might still taste disgusting, the buzz is kinda nice."

Olivia didn't bother telling her that it was the reason why most people drank alcohol in the first place; not because it tasted good, but because enough of it numbed the pain.

"So," Liv kept on going, now cocking her head at her, and looking buzzed alright. "Do you hear them too?"

Olivia remained very quiet and still. She absolutely did _not_ want to share her feelings about this with her, or with anybody else, really. The only reason why she had told Lincoln about the hole had been because at times, she just couldn't help herself from relating too much, and she had wanted to let him know that she understood. She wanted him to realize that she _knew_.

And apparently, unexpectedly, it would appear that Liv knew, too.

She still did not want to talk about this with her, to talk about the dreams, or his face, and the absence she constantly felt. She was even less interested in understanding what this shared feeling might mean.

And so she shook her head and simply said: "I don't hear any crying baby."

Which was the truth. She could see in these eyes that looked so much like hers that she knew she wasn't being truly honest –especially after her little bout of anger minutes before, but she didn't seem to care much. After all, she had told her right away that she didn't want to talk about this, that she had only come here hoping to find a distraction.

And it was quickly becoming obvious again from the way she was staring at her, that Olivia _was_ the distraction.

"Stop it." Olivia told her firmly, hating the way her heartbeat was already increasing again, this woman having the uncanny ability to get her all worked up over nothing.

Liv smiled slyly. "I'm not doing anything."

Olivia wasn't amused, not to mention honestly tired of her games and the uneasiness the situation was creating in her. "You're staring at me with that… _look_ again. I don't like it."

Anyone else would surely have been at least _slightly_ embarrassed, or considerate enough to stop whatever disconcerting behavior they were displaying. But not her, oh no; she seemed to truly rejoice in getting any kind of reaction out of Olivia.

And boy was she good at it.

"I can't help it," she said then with another shrug, her lopsided smile back on her lips. "I think you're hot."

Needless to say it successfully shocked Olivia. "You think I'm-" But she had to stop, shaking her head in both disbelief and annoyance. "Are you _kidding me_?"

The smile turned into a grin. "Nope."

Olivia couldn't fight it anymore, both her hands briefly coming up to her face, palms pressed together as she drew a sharp breath in. She was clearly trying to mess with her head now, and the worst part was that she was being annoyingly successful. When she dropped her hands, she gave her Alternate a very disapproving look, shaking her head again. "What is wrong with you?"

Liv chuckled, obviously refusing to stop smiling. "What, you don't think _I'm_ hot?"

"Wh-" But that sentence too stopped before it even began, dropping the hand that had already sneakily made its way up to her hair with an aggravated sigh. "I'm sorry if you find it hard to comprehend, but I don't think of you in terms of _hot_ or _not hot_."

This earned her a snort; she seemed incredibly relaxed and unbothered by the conversation they were having, one of her feet now up against the door, arms loosely crossed in front of her chest again, a very inappropriate posture, really.

"Oh c'mon," she said with an intent look. "It's only human to gauge people that way, even more so when you get to meet another version of yourself. There's nothing wrong about it."

Olivia could feel her cheeks burning in indignation again, unsure of what she was feeling exactly, but irritation and embarrassment were clearly part of the mix. "Oh, it's not wrong at all," she said sarcastically, her own arms crossed again as she started pacing once more. "It just makes you incredibly narcissistic."

Liv calmly watched her going back and forth in front of her bed, clearly enjoying herself. "And so what if I'm a bit narcissistic? I've never said I was perfect, not that I wanna be." And she grinned again at that. "Doesn't change the fact that we're both hot."

Olivia stopped abruptly, glaring at her in a way that would have made more than one person recoil in fear of impending death. But Liv didn't even blink…which was very unsettling. Yet again, why would she feel intimidated by a look she herself loved to give on occasions?

"I'm not trying to embarrass you," Liv said then, losing her smile a little. "I'm just curious. You intrigue me."

Olivia really didn't want to be in this room anymore. Yet, she seemed unable to look away from the other woman. She could lie to herself all she wanted, the fact remained that she was surely just as equally intrigued by her Alternate.

The main difference was that Olivia didn't want to ponder on it, while _she_ seemed to have made it her new project.

"You can stop your investigation," she told her quite sternly, though she still felt like her blood was boiling in her veins. "There's nothing intriguing about me."

Liv simply smiled knowingly at that, before finally pushing herself away from the door, taking a step towards her, and Olivia fought the urge to take a step back. She would not bend and admit defeat.

"I think it's sad you see yourself that way," Liv told her, her eyes going up and down her body again. "Like I said, you definitely intrigue me."

Olivia didn't think the odd tension she felt crackling between them could get any thicker, and yet she was pretty sure it had just gone up a notch. She still did not avert her eyes, though, standing her ground in a very tense posture.

"Just try and think of me as someone who's _not_ an alternate version of you," Liv said then, with a slight pout. "If I was anyone else, you wouldn't think I was even a little bit hot?"

God she was stubborn…and drunk. And _definitely_ narcissistic.

Amazingly, though, Olivia found herself holding back the smallest of smiles. She was still annoyed, and slightly embarrassed, and all kind of confused and worked up, but she had to admit that this was hardly harmful.

She relaxed slightly, even though the whole situation still made her feel weirdly uncomfortable.

Eventually, she shrugged a bit stiffly, arms still crossed. "I don't know." She finally said. "I guess generally speaking, I think you're more…uhm…I don't know. Sexy, I guess."

And there she was blushing again, instantly regretting her words, even though they were true. She had always inwardly and reluctantly been somewhat jealous of the way her Alternate seemed to be so at ease in a body that was basically similar to hers.

Liv tilted her head, hands on her hips, frowning a bit exceedingly. "You don't think you're sexy."

Olivia did not miss the fact that it was not a question, and pursed her lips disapprovingly. "I didn't say that."

"No, you didn't, but you still believe it," Liv instantly replied, her eyes looking her over yet again as she kept on frowning, distractingly nibbling on her lip. While Olivia was left feeling inadequate again, she seemed lost in some intense contemplation. "Hasn't anyone ever told you you were sexy?" She asked then, and for once, her voice didn't even have any flirty consonance. She seemed really puzzled.

Olivia knew on some level that she was genuinely surprised, her reaction even accentuated by her current state, and that she wasn't mocking her in any way. But she couldn't help it; she felt self-conscious all over again, almost hollow, as if this void still throbbing had emptied her of anything beautiful and worthy that could have maybe made someone look at her the way this Lincoln looked at her Alternate.

She had loved before, and been loved –or at least these men had said the words. And there had been times when she had felt pretty good and confident. But it had been a long time ago.

Many, many, many months had passed since then, so many of them that they had turned into years. Maybe her past lovers had told her she was sexy, or had let her know one way or another. She couldn't remember.

And trying to remember only made her that much more aware of what wasn't there.

Maybe too much of what she was feeling and thinking about reflected on her face, because the look on Liv's face had changed too. She looked almost serious now, her gaze as intense as ever.

And so Olivia shrugged a little, still hugging herself, as if trying to shake some of her shadows away. "I guess you've heard it more often than me," she finally answered quite bleakly. She didn't even feel any kind of resentment.

Mostly, she just felt numb now. That was what tended to happen when she let the loneliness spread.

Liv was still staring at her, and Olivia wondered briefly if she maybe felt a bit of what she felt, considering what she had told her earlier.

"What do you think makes me sexier than you?"

One thing for sure, stubbornness was a trait they shared.


	2. Part Two

"What do you think makes me sexier than you?"

One thing for sure, stubbornness was a trait they shared.

Olivia sighed, rolling her neck a little to release some of the tension that had accumulated there, and doing so, she started to reconnect with what was still happening. She figured she had better answer her questions, because she obviously wouldn't let it go. She shrugged again.

"I don't know…" She said, tiredly. "Your clothes?"

This actually caused her Alternate to smile again, followed by her raised eyebrow. "What about the clothes I'm wearing tonight? Do you still think I'm sexier than you right now?"

"Right now, I think you're being obnoxious," Olivia answered truthfully, the irritation definitely back, along with a bunch of other feelings she really didn't want to dwell upon.

Liv chuckled. "Well, _that_ 's a given, but I can blame it on the whiskey." Under Olivia's skeptical glare, she nodded her head. "Okay, I'm pretty much always obnoxious, even sober. Still, you're not answering my question."

"It's because I don't have an answer to your question," Olivia replied, annoyed, unwrapping her arms and letting her hands fly in front of her as she spoke. "What do I need to say to make you drop it? That I think you're definitely sexier than me, probably always was and always will be? Fine. You're the sexy one. Congratulation, you win this round, too."

Liv was walking towards her now, and before she knew it, she had grabbed one of her arms, trying to make her follow her to the other end of the room. Olivia tried to free herself from her grip, ignoring the shudder that shot through her flesh where she had grabbed her.

"What are you doing?" she asked impatiently, but her hold on her was strong.

"C'mon, I just want to show you something," Liv said calmly, but when Olivia still refused to move and kept fighting against her grip, she stopped pulling, rolling her eyes. "Seriously, have a little faith in yourself."

Olivia narrowed her eyes. "Oh, you're very funny."

Liv smirked, wiggling her eyebrow. "I know, right?" Then she was pulling again. "C'mon, I swear it will be painless."

Very reluctantly –she still did not trust her in the least, she let herself be led, quickly realizing that Liv simply intended to make her stand in front of the long mirror that covered the dresser's door. Or rather to make them _both_ stand there as it appeared; the mirror might be long, it wasn't very large, so that Liv ended up standing shamelessly closely behind her, slightly on the side, both her hands on her shoulders now, something she decided not to focus on either.

Olivia quickly took in her own reflection, disheveled hair and clothes; she now had the visual confirmation of what she had been feeling for a while: she had indeed been blushing, her cheeks pinker than she had seen them in ages. She definitely looked flustered.

Damn, she _was_ flustered; Liv was standing way too close to her, her fingers on her shoulders already burning through the fabric of her shirt.

She forced herself to clear her head. She hadn't had any alcohol herself, but it was almost 3am, she hadn't slept in almost two days again and had been feeling on the edge ever since she'd had to come Over There for their case; right now, she felt like her every nerve was raw and exposed, responsive to the slightest change, making her extremely aware. It was odd, considering how numb she usually felt these days, and yet it was understandable. She understood why any kind of human contact would cause her body to produce such a decent amount of endorphins already, but understanding it didn't make it okay.

God, how needy had she gotten in the past three years, exactly?

Feeling and _seeing_ herself blush even harder at her own thoughts, she focused on her Alternate's face instead of where her hands were resting. Looking at their reflections, both of them standing there in their pajamas, she couldn't ignore the fact that, with the exception of their hair, they both looked quite identical at the moment.

She didn't miss the irony in this.

And apparently, that was exactly what Liv wanted her to notice, because she asked: "What do you see?"

"Is there any other valid answer beside 'us'?" She asked back, not entirely annoyed anymore, but still thinking this was pointless.

Liv ignored her, staring at her without any trace of a smile left on her lips as she came even closer to her, practically pinning herself behind her. Olivia wanted to move, way too aware of their proximity and the way her body was tensing at the feel of her, knowing that _she_ could feel and see each of her reactions.

And yet she didn't move, hardly blinking at all.

"Look at me," Liv said quietly in her ear, tightening her grip on her shoulders, and Olivia could only obey. "And look at you. You think I'm sexier, but you don't even know why. It's obviously not the clothes. Is it because I'm happier, less lonely? Truth is, I woke up crying two hours ago, and emptied the mini-bar that was in my room. You, on the other hand, have obviously not gotten any sleep in ages, and you're an emotional wreck for whatever reason that you don't have to share, that's not the point."

Olivia felt her breath on her cheek with every word she said, which made her own breathing quite difficult. Hearing what she was saying was becoming harder, too, over the pounding of her heart.

But she heard every word.

"The point is…" And she actually moved one of her hands then, letting go of her shoulder to thread her fingers into her blonde hair, slowly brushing it away to expose her tense and pulsing neck, and her eyes were still firmly locked with hers when she whispered in her ear "…I don't care if you're a mess. I still think you're incredibly sexy."

Olivia let out a breath she didn't even know she had been holding until it came wobbling out of her lungs, and she was powerless against the shudder that shook her body. The hand that had moved her hair was now lightly making its way down her back, barely grazing her shirt, but it was already too much for Olivia, who felt overwhelmed with a frightening amount of conflicting emotions.

She had always heard people talk about how there only was a fine line between hate and love, but she was now experiencing the smooth and disturbing shift between irritation and lust, and she couldn't be less prepared for any of this.

Her head was screaming at her, screaming that she had to move away from Liv, possibly get out and far from the room before things got any weirder –because she had no doubt they could. But her head held very little power over the heated feeling under her skin, something she hadn't felt in so long she hardly remembered it existed. It was as if a fire had suddenly been ignited within herself, fueled by emboldening words and blazing green eyes that were bearing into hers.

And yet, it was these exact same eyes that made this so preposterous.

She swallowed hard, still afraid to make a single move, even if it was just to look away, but this was simply too much. She shook her head weakly, her breathing a bit shallow now. "This is so wrong," she managed to articulate, and she didn't miss the fact that her voice was hoarse, another obvious sign of how ridiculously affected she was.

When Liv's moving hand finally came to rest on her waist, rather possessively, she drew a sharp breath in, and a small smirk was back on Liv's lips. "You think too much, Olivia," she told her. "One of the many aspects that make us so different…" Her second hands was moving too, now, and Olivia was convinced that her heart was trying to pound its way out of her chest. "There's nothing wrong in allowing yourself to relax…in closing your eyes and enjoying yourself."

As if it had been a request rather than an observation, her eyes closed, then, almost of their own accord, and she knew she was going insane. There was no other explanation to why she hadn't moved away yet, or didn't really want to move away, actually starting to sink into Liv's touch. Maybe her three years spent working on horrendous cases, forcing her to gain knowledge that kept on reshaping everything she had ever believed in, had finally taken their toll and ripped her of her sanity.

Or maybe she was simply lonely.

She was so miserably lonely, tired of feeling empty and abandoned, even if she knew that what she was constantly missing so viscerally went beyond simple lust. For now, though, lust was quite enough, the ache being hushed by the feelings growing beneath her skin, as fingers moved over her shirt and a warm breath burned the skin of her neck.

"There's nothing wrong in letting someone take care of you…"

She kept on whispering those tantalizing words in her ear, and it was as if she had become the embodiment of that little voice in a corner of her head, a voice she so rarely listened to nowadays, because it always promised her delights and resulted in heartaches. That little voice had taken physical form, now, her body firmly pinned against hers as one of her hands traced upward patterns on her shirt, making its way up to her breast.

"Nothing wrong in feeling desired…"

Words held power. Olivia had always known that to be true. But she had rarely had the occasion to experience just what kind of power they could have in such situations.

Her fever increased, expended, spread, and got exponentially worse when Liv's fingers reached her breast, and she kept on drawing slow patterns on the fabric covering her flesh, until she cupped it fully and gave it an appreciative squeeze, pressing her thumb upon her hardened nipple. Warmth shot downward, causing her to swallow back a rising moan.

Her senses did not get a single second of rest, as Liv's other hand was now slipping beneath her shirt, and her palm felt incredibly cool upon the blazing skin of her stomach, under which lay the center of her newest pulsing aches. When she felt her fingers starting to slip under the hem of her pants, though, Olivia's hand suddenly moved at last, coming up to rest on hers, stopping her movement, and she reopened her eyes.

The reflection the mirror was sending back to her was enough to frazzle her even more. There was something both disturbing and entrancing in this double image; she clearly was not the only one affected by this, the blush on their skins the same shade of pink, and Liv held her gaze with dizzying intensity.

But Olivia's doubts and fears were never far. Even though her body was still humming against its duplicate, she felt all of her insecurities creeping back already, incredibly fast. Above all, she felt dreadfully vulnerable at that instant, as if she had lost all control, something she never liked in the first place, even less when it came to this particular woman. She felt like she had let too many of her defenses down, and that it was what _she_ had been planning on the whole time.

"What do you want from me?" Olivia whispered, chest heaving, still all too aware of where both her Alternate's hands were resting, their reflection making it that much more obvious, and her frightening confusion only worsened.

Liv shook her head slightly, still breathing against her neck. "I don't want anything from you. Though I won't lie, I would like to see what a real smile looks like on you, sometimes."

But Olivia couldn't have been farther away from smiling, and it was clearly written all over her face.

She was so lost, her body nothing but a traitor at that instant, completely fogging her mind with sensations she had been doing fine without for a very long time…and now, she was only craving for more.

But the voice of Reason, the one that had been silenced by this other, entrancing voice, was now fighting back, insisting that this was all a lie, a trap, an ambush. Her heart was still pounding furiously, and it was so hard to breathe.

As if snapping out of a very strange trance, she hastily freed herself from Liv's embrace, staggering slightly as she put some distance between them. She was completely unable to stay still, though, her blood full of endorphin, her head reeling.

She went back to pacing more distressfully than ever, a trembling hand already up in her hair. Actually, her whole body was shaking faintly as she stared at her Alternate, who simply seemed a bit puzzled by the sudden return of her obvious suspicion.

"What are you trying to do, exactly?" Olivia asked impatiently, all of her anger suddenly boiling again just under the surface –among other things. She was very well aware of the fact that her irritation was doing nothing to help her calm down, quite the contrary actually, but there really wasn't anything she could do about it.

She was nothing but a ball of nerves.

"I'm not trying _anything_ ," Liv repeated, and it was becoming clear that she was tired of her accusations, her own exasperation starting to show, in the way her hands were back on her hips in a defensive posture for example.

Olivia paced and paced, fuming. "Is this some kind of sick mind game?"

"God, you're paranoid!" Liv exclaimed with a swoop of her hand, definitely affected by her anger. She actually started mimicking Olivia's movements, then, so that they were literally circling each other, their glares matching in their intensity. "Why would I even do that kind of things?"

"You said it yourself," Olivia retorted. "You like to piss me off!"

"I also said it was basically because I liked pulling the stick out of your ass!" She was almost shouting now, her inebriation obviously making her more prone to explosive anger. "In case you haven't noticed, I was being pretty successful until you decided to freak out on me again, when there really is no secret plan to ruin your life behind this!"

"So why do I always feel like you're trying to mess with me?" Olivia snapped, stopping abruptly, her whole body about to burst.

"Because you're incapable of any kind of trust, especially in yourself, and I'm talking about _you_." Liv exclaimed with a scowl. "I've told you I wasn't here to mess with you, I'm gaining absolutely nothing out of this."

"Why won't you just leave me alone?" Olivia asked as firmly as she could, livid and infuriated. "Why do you even feel the need to 'pull the stick out of my ass', exactly? I'm doing fine on my own!"

Liv actually scoffed at that, which was not very smart. "Oh yeah? So you don't resent me _at all_ for the things you don't have?"

"Your life is no better than mine," Olivia said in a very low voice. She was so furious that her words were quivering.

"No, it's not," she unexpectedly agreed. "That's what I'm trying to show you. The only reason why you feel like I'm better than you is because you let me _be_ better than you."

"What is that supposed to mean?" She sneered at her.

"It means what it means," Liv retorted with a dark chuckle. "You don't have to be the 'weak one', or the burdened one. If you want the power, _take_ the power, for Christ's sake!"

If there was one thing Olivia never turned away from, it was from a dare. And this one challenge was standing right there in front of her, just as infuriated and worked up as she was, eyes and face ablaze, _daring_ her to do something, anything, to prove her that she could be the one in control, too.

The one with the power.

She was so crazed that for a fleeting second, she was almost tempted to do something very stupid and impulsive, something that would satisfy the intense yearning in her guts. But she had the power over that, too.

"Alright," Olivia said then with a sharp nod, before walking to the door without giving it another thought. She opened it wide, and turned to face Liv again, who looked very disgruntled. "Get out."

"Fine," she said with a shrug, as if she didn't care, despite the dark stare she gave her on her way to the door.

"Fine," Olivia repeated just as darkly, and as soon as she had passed the threshold, she closed the door loudly behind her, something she should have done over thirty minutes ago.

For a glorious few moments, her angry gesture and assertive decision actually made her feel quite accomplished as she resumed her frenzied pacing. This was good, she had shown her she wouldn't be messed with any longer, or never again for that matter, and _god_ she was so annoying, and rude, and infuriating, this was definitely for the best.

Unfortunately, this feeling was short-lived, and died out way faster than all of these other feelings that still refused to leave her be. She honestly couldn't remember a time when she had felt so restless, in every possible way. She was uncomfortably aware of every inch of her body, it seemed; the simple feel of her clothes on her skin was a friction she could hardly bear.

Her pace quickly slowed down, as the silence now surrounding her became thicker and thicker, forcing her to realize just how alone she was again, with nothing to occupy her mind but her need to overanalyze everything that had just happened. It was that, or letting these feelings of seclusion and hollowness take hold of her again.

She kept throwing glances at the door as she walked, but she fought that other urge too, the urge to check if _she_ had gone.

She gave in depressingly fast, telling herself she wouldn't be able to calm down until she had made sure she had left the hallway for good as she walked back to the door, pressing her eye to the peephole once more.

Unsurprisingly, Liv hadn't gone anywhere.

She was actually pacing herself, though it couldn't be more different from Olivia's furious strut. True to her usual demeanor, it was more of a swaggy kind of walk, though it might simply be caused by her lack of balance, thanks to the alcohol.

Olivia's first thought was that she was only staying there to piss her off a little more. But the rest of her demeanor went against that theory. She was twisting her fingers as she walked, apparently biting down on her lip again, something she seemed to be doing as unconsciously and frequently as Olivia's habit to run her fingers through her hair whenever she felt particularly upset. And Liv did look upset, truth be told.

Olivia wanted to rejoice at the thought, take pleasure in the fact that she was not the only one feeling like crap right now, but that feeling fell flat. Sometimes she really wished she was less empathetic, especially to people who did not exactly deserve her compassion, in any way. But to make matters worse, she couldn't help but remember Liv's face when she had told her about what had led her here in the first place, about the baby's cries, something that made absolutely no sense at all, but the absence Olivia continually felt, now more than ever, didn't make any sense either; the fact was that whatever Liv was experiencing, it was strong enough to cause her to wake up in tears and make her turn to alcohol to try and make it stop.

Maybe she wasn't staying in her hallway to annoy her. Maybe she was still here because she didn't want to go back to her room, still rather drunk, with nothing to do but resume her drinking.

Maybe she simply had nowhere else to go.

Olivia closed her eyes and lowered her head, resting her forehead against the door, which felt incredibly cool compared to the still burning skin of her face, as she made another decision that was undoubtedly a mistake.

"Shit…" she muttered to herself disapprovingly, before grabbing the doorknob and opening the door one more time.

Liv's surprised look when she heard the door opening was another proof that she hadn't been staying there hoping to get another reaction out of her, and when their gazes met, Olivia saw nothing but honest confusion in her eyes.

Olivia didn't say a word, simply nodded her head towards the inside of her room, letting her know that she could come back in, before moving aside to let her in. Once she was inside, Olivia closed the door, and it was her turn to lean against it, hand still on the doorknob behind her –not because she intended to open it again, more for the physical relief of holding something in her hands.

Mirroring their previous positions, Liv was now standing a few feet away, hands clasped together in front of her. She was simply looking at her, without any coy smile or look, as if she was still letting her take full charge of what was going to be said next. Her gaze still remained too intense, even if she didn't seem to be doing it on purpose anymore.

Letting her back in was a terrible idea, Olivia was all too aware of that. At least when there had been a door and a wall separating them, she had been able to try and get her emotions under control. Now, it seemed so pointless it was almost laughable. She could almost see the tension that was crackling in the empty space between them. Unexpectedly, she thought of Walter and of his talks about the pulls that existed between their two universes.

She wondered what he would have to say about the kind of pull she felt right now.

Not that she would ever, _ever_ mention any of this to him of course, or anybody else for that matter. She had a hard time admitting it to herself already –any of her _selves_ , as weird as it may sound.

She knew she was blushing quite furiously again, a reaction she seriously had no power over; all she could do was hold on to her doorknob and keep as much composure as she could manage as she stared back at Liv. And she decided there was no point in denying the giant elephant in the room, or more precisely, the fact that she was feeling things towards her Alternate she should definitely _not_ be feeling. The only thing she could do was try and make sense of it, as much as she could.

"Why aren't you bothered by this?" She eventually asked in a hushed voice, her heart already pounding even faster at the simple act of talking openly about this.

Liv still looked amazingly calm as she shrugged slightly, cocking her head. "Why should I be bothered?"

Olivia's face scrunched in incredulity. "Do you want me to list the reasons in alphabetical order?" She asked, not sounding entirely annoyed. Mostly, she sounded very confused.

Liv actually started to move towards her, then, slowly, only one step at a time. "I'm not saying this is right," she admitted with another tilt of her head. "But I don't think it's wrong either."

With each small step she took, reducing the distance between them, Olivia shoulders pressed harder into the wood of the door, and she didn't know if she was hoping for it to become unsubstantial so that she could slip through it, or if she hoped she would gain some of its unmovable characteristics –the inability to feel anything for example.

"How can't you think of this as wrong?" She asked, her voice even quieter than before, completely unable to look away from her gaze as she took yet another step.

"I've never been one to care much about what others see as morally wrong," Liv said, with an apologetic shrug, and Olivia knew what she was referring to.

She actually tried to focus back on the feeling of intense resentment she usually always felt when she thought about how her life had been stolen by this woman. She failed quite dramatically, her haze too thick now as Liv stopped very close to her.

"I'm not asking you to trust me; I understand why you can't," Liv said. "Though I mean it when I say I'm not playing any game with you, or won't. What I did to you in the past was fucked up, but I also know part of you can understand why I did it anyway."

Olivia might have replied something to this –what, she wasn't sure, but Liv leaned forward then, resting one of her arms on the door, near her head. Even though it was surely a move meant to help her keep her balance, it also efficiently erased most of the space that had been left between them.

Olivia was now tightly enclosed between the door, her fist still wrapped around the doorknob that was now digging into her lower back, and the body radiating heat inches away from hers. Breathing had become extremely hard, with her face so close to hers.

"Why are you doing this?" Olivia asked again, barely hearing her own whispered words over the sound of her heart, thumping so loudly against her ears.

Liv shook her head, almost imperceptibly, but she was so close that she could see every change of expression, every detail. "I don't really know." She shook her head again. "Or maybe I do. I just…we both know we're often more different than we are similar, for a lot of reasons. And some of those reasons are the people we have in our lives. You have friends, I know you do. But at the end of the day, you're too proud to let them in. I know, because I'm like that, too. But I also have my mom. I have Frank. And I can't stop wondering…who cares for you?"

If there was one feeling Olivia had not expected to feel right now, it was the intense ache at the base of her throat, her words hitting spots that were too raw, and above all too true.

At the end of the day, she had no one.

She knew everything she was feeling was displayed on her face, in her eyes. She could tell that Liv hadn't meant any of this in mockery, quite the contrary, and that was exactly why it felt like a new bruise on her pride.

Olivia swallowed hard, and it was her turn to shake her head slightly. "I don't need your pity," she murmured.

Liv moved then, pushing herself forwards slightly, just enough to erase the last inch that had been separating them, and as a violent shudder traveled through her entire body at the feel of her, Liv's eyes moved, too, downward to her mouth, before bringing her gaze back up. "Oh believe me, this is really not pity."

As she closed her eyes, it occurred to Olivia that some things went beyond the matter of who was who, what it meant, or what the consequences might be.

Some things were simply about instinct and desire. It was not about what was wrong, but what felt right.

And as lips brushed hers with a softness she had truly not expected, she breathed in deeply, inhaling a scent that was both so familiar and foreign, instinct taking over indeed. Because a kiss was kiss, no matter who was giving it or who was receiving it, and it wasn't long before Olivia lost herself to the sensation, everything that had been building up tonight -and for months before that, washing over her with breathtaking force, and she let her body take complete control.

She was welcoming the spreading warmth, for the warmth made the cold recede, that atrocious cold that made the world so bleak.

Even though her mind seemed to be rapidly disconnecting from said world –which one, she wasn't really sure anymore, she was still incredibly aware of their every move, because every move they made only increased their closeness. She felt Liv's fingers on her face, felt them curl into her hair, and above all, she felt the pressure of her body, so real against hers; it was something else she had forgotten, just how good it felt to be held in any way, to feel connected.

To feel less alone in the world.

Her own hands had long let go of the doorknob, and she was now clinging to her shirt, twisting the fabric in a desperate grip to bring her even closer as they kissed deeper, ignoring the way the knob was now digging into her back, or how it scratched her skin with her every move as her body curved into hers, lost in a dance with increasing tempo.

She was so immersed into the sensation of slowly drifting away into a misty heat that she did not immediately realize that the kiss had stopped. When she reopened her eyes, her gaze was met by a pair of green irises that seemed just as foggy as she felt, their chests heaving almost in unison against one another.

Liv must have been enjoying the sight of her, because she actually smirked a little then, biting down on her lip, a gesture that was suddenly taking a whole new dimension in Olivia's mind, entangling itself with everything else already boiling within her flesh.

And she felt ludicrously _okay_ about this, at that instant, well aware of the fact that a time would come when she would not be. That time would not come now, however, not with her head and blood swirling with endorphins, the way Liv's were with alcohol. Trying to think rationally now was almost ridiculous.

Olivia felt her shift her weight a little to the side, the pressure upon her lessening slightly as Liv still maintained herself up using her arm, pinned to the door near Olivia's head. Without a single word, she lowered her head to hers again, and though she did not go for her lips, Olivia closed her eyes again. Her nose grazed her cheek, her breath warm and soft on her neck, and she heard and _felt_ her inhale her scent; the hand that had been up in her hair started trailing down her body, creating shivers wherever her fingers brushed her skin, even through the fabric of her clothes.

When she started kissing her jaw, slowly moving her lips purposefully towards a particularly sensitive spot on its underside, Olivia's breath hitched, instinctively tilting her head back as she welcomed the sensation. Liv's hand had now made its way under her shirt, and was traveling leisurely over her skin, regularly toying with the hem of pants, but never going lower than her waist.

When the feel of her lips on that sensitive area was suddenly replaced by the very wet feel of her tongue, Olivia let out a sigh that was close to a moan, one of her own hands finally reaching up to grab Liv's nape, digging her fingers through hair and skin, another clear sign of how much she was affecting her.

Liv moved her lips near her ear, then, and Olivia could almost hear the smile in her voice when she whispered: "Let's help you relax…"

A blurry second later, her lips were upon hers again, kissing her with such eagerness that it was nearly enough to completely shut down Olivia's brain. Even though she had been excepting it, and quite honestly awaiting it, Olivia was not prepared for the feel of her hand finally slipping into her pants and _down_ , not prepared for the intensity of the rush that surged through her when Liv swiftly found what needed to be found.

The kiss broke as Olivia lost all control over her body; hips rolling into her touch, she moaned against her lips, her head filling with light, even though her eyes were so tightly shut. It was the kind of light that could only come from within, and one thing for sure, Liv knew how to brighten her mind.

This was sinful, but she couldn't care less anymore, slave to jolts of pleasures shooting through her every nerve, and it was her turn to bite down onto Liv's lip as she tried to muffle another moan.

Needy as she was, and being handled by such an expert hand, Olivia had no doubt that it wouldn't be long at all before she spectacularly crashed and burned, a blissful deliverance she was more than craving for, and Liv must have been very well aware of it, too.

Which was undoubtedly why she suddenly stopped, her hand coming back out as swiftly as it had come in.

Needless to say, Olivia did not approve, and offered her a disgruntled, glassy glare as soon as she reopened her eyes, as she tried to catch her breath. It caused Liv to actually _chuckle_.

"Oh my god, you're _pouting_ ," she laughed lightheartedly, instantly reminding a now very annoyed Olivia of the fact that she was still pretty drunk. She felt quite intoxicated herself, though not for the same reasons, and was decided on getting what she needed without letting her tendency to over-think get in the way again.

"Shut up," she breathed out, then -though it was possible that she might be pouting a little, pushing Liv away so that they would finally move from the door, causing her to stumble backward, Olivia quickly grabbing her waist to steady her.

She then swiftly grabbed her face as they swayed towards the bed, kissing her so that she wouldn't have to slap that smirk off her face, kissing her with all the force of her renewed irritation, erasing the last of her grin.

Her annoyance couldn't have been more different from what she had been feeling only earlier that night, though, the heated flow of emotions only melding with everything that was already burning within her, and she had no doubt that she was would soon implode.

In that game they were definitely playing –and Olivia wasn't entirely sure of _when_ exactly she had entered it, Liv was a skilled opponent, and it was clear by the way she was meeting Olivia's craze with feverish ardor that she was going to fight for the upper hand.

She was actually already upping the ante, both her hands leaving the curve of Olivia's back to push her pants down, so that by the time they reached the bed, Olivia had managed to throw it aside with an annoyed kick, somewhat wondering how they hadn't tripped and fallen yet. Balance and possible concussions were a few less things to worry about when they finally fell onto the mattress, in a flurry of hair and entangled limbs.

Their initial rolling motion over the entire length of the bed led Olivia to be on top, a position she definitely approved of when it came to this particular situation, but it quickly became obvious that Liv had more experience when it came to wrestling between the sheets, and she knew how to get her way. No matter how hard Olivia encircled her between her thighs, or pinned her down with her entire body, she somehow ended up on her back, pinned to the mattress, quite unable to explain how and when she had lost her shirt, exactly.

For a timeless moment, Olivia truly stopped thinking about how she should not let herself be defeated so fast, even if it was in such a playful and sensual manner, as Liv was all too eager to take full advantage of her now entirely exposed body. She moved over her with an ease and confidence that was as decadent as it was entrancing, obviously knowing where exactly she needed to focus her attention.

All Olivia could do was yield to her smoldering touch, may it be her lips and teeth and tongue on her breasts and all around, or these hands that were so incredibly good at teasing her in the most torturous ways, her own fingers now lost into that cascade of hair that shined as brightly as the fire restlessly sizzling every inch of her body. She was so powerless, sinking deeper and deeper, her entire body quivering in delectation, and all she could do was ripple and sigh under her caresses.

Liv also knew when to stop, long enough to allow the pressure to decrease slightly, but just as equally brief so that Olivia would not feel the renewed urge to slap her. Not that she could have, even if she had wanted to; she seemed unable to focus on anything but her own rush of sensations, not that Liv seemed to mind, all to happy to be the one taking care of her, at last.

And it seemed like every time Olivia opened her eyes during these short pauses, Liv had somehow succeeded in getting rid of one more piece of her own clothing. Olivia almost wanted to ask just _how_ she could manage such prowess in her state, but that was another pointless thought that simply dissolved away when Liv slithered over her again, her body now as bare upon hers. The feeling alone of flushed skins meeting and brushing and rubbing, of plump flesh and enticing warmth moving upon her, was almost enough to cause Olivia to shatter, intoxicated by this closeness she hadn't felt in years, overwhelmed by the sheer sensuality of it all.

No matter how good it felt, something in her still could not accept the fact that she was going to let Liv take complete control. She was so utterly high, having rarely felt so close to literally drifting away, as it had to be inevitable now, her every cells about to break apart...and yet, her innate desire to dominate would not go away.

As Liv came back to her level, having decided to undertake another exploration of her neck and collarbone with her lips and tongue, Olivia forced herself to concentrate long enough to move her legs over hers strategically and purposefully, and with a powerful push, she finally succeeded in rolling them over. Her victory was short-lived, though; Liv used the last of their movement to bring herself up in a sitting position, causing Olivia to lose balance. Liv's reflexes were still astonishingly fast, holding onto her so that she would not tilt over.

Trying to bring the other back down again was pointless, and yet they tried, in a heated battle of lips and hands and tongues; the only thing this inane wrestling succeeded in doing was in notably increasing the thirst for each other's body. The friction was nothing short of dizzying, and when Olivia made herself stop moving long enough to fill her lungs with some air, she was now kneeling and straddling one of her thighs, their bodies closely intertwined, finally at an equal level.

There was absolutely no point in trying to focus on anything but _her_ , the rest of the room a total blur; nothing existed but her bright green eyes and vibrant hair, and she needed to remain lost in the warmth of their cocoon, as much as she needed to find release, a yearning that was now throbbing in every inch of her being, it seemed.

Nonetheless, she may not have had any physical encounter in a few years -or never with a woman for that matter, she was quite certain that these kind of activities were supposed to be reciprocal; no matter the situation she was in, Olivia was still too selfless not to realize that at the moment, she was indeed being very self-centered.

She leaned her forehead against Liv's, panting for air, as if oxygen could help her brain refocus long enough for her to utter a few words, or manage a few moves that were not purely instinctive. As Olivia brought both her hands to her face, once again almost bewildered by the softness of her skin as well as by the gentleness in her eyes, she shook her head, apologetically. "I'm sorry…" she managed to say in a breathless whisperer. "I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing..."

Unsurprisingly, Liv simply smiled at that, her fingers moving slowly over her back, never ceasing the massaging of her skin. "Don't worry about me," she said quietly, then, shifting slightly so that she could bring one of her hands between them. "You need this more than I do." And as she whispered those words against her lips, she paid full attention to the part of her that was aching the most.

"Oh God…" she breathed out, almost in relief, her hands instinctively moving further into Liv's blazing hair as her body shot up, until she was completely encircling her head in her arms, once again overcome with an endless rush of sensations.

And as her body slowly started to rock against hers, her own head thrown back, Liv began scattering kisses alongside her jaw, down to her neck, and then farther below, in a never-ending pattern of gentle yet ardent caresses that truly made her feel quite beautiful.

Soon, Liv was joining the dance, and their skins glistened in the same light as their sighs and moans blended in harmony, swaying and undulating in perfect symbiosis, as it had to be.

And Olivia thought no more.


	3. Part Three

Of all the things that should have been bothering Liv about having gotten ridiculously _drunk_ the previous night, the headache honestly had to be the worst of them all.

Her first thought upon awaking from a very short and restless sleep was ' _Fuck, I'm never drinking again._ ' She hadn't even opened her eyes yet, and she already hated everything about what had to be the start of a bad hangover.

Then, squinting her eyes open in the dim light of the hotel room, she forgot about the headache for a moment. Even though she had never been much of a drinker herself, she had heard her share of stories, Lincoln having provided quite a few of them. She knew all about how some people woke up after a night of heavy drinking and found unexpected guess in their beds. She was pretty sure she had just won all the awards, though.

Seriously, how many people could say alcohol had led them to have sex with an alternate version of themselves? Even without alcohol, this had to be rather exceptional in itself.

Liv had been awake for a good ten minutes now, and she had barely moved at all, except for some blinking and breathing, but she wasn't exactly doing these things consciously. All she could do was _stare_ at Olivia, who was still sleeping unsurprisingly soundly. After her initial few seconds of shock and confusion, Liv had remembered quite vividly everything that had happened a few hours before; apparently, the whole _'you never remember what you did when you're drunk'_ was a big fat myth. Hence the staring.

There was no way she could have those memories in her head, that woman curled up in bed next to her with her toes digging in the front of her calf, and manage anything but bewildered staring.

She might remember the entire progression of what had happened, she had a harder time believing it. Sure, she had always been aware of the tension that existed between them, had even played it, stretching it to the point of being uncomfortable because, as she had told Olivia last night, she did enjoy getting her all worked up.

She had never actually thought she should _act_ on it in any way, though. Had it been any other person –man or woman, Liv really didn't care much, she would have loved the challenge, and tried her best to get her way.

But this hadn't been any other person; this had been her _Alternate_ , an Alternate who seemed to think Fun should be prohibited.

As they began to work together more and more often, Liv came to think of that crackling tension between them as the pull that existed between the opposite poles of two identical magnets. If they had been exactly the same in every way, and not just on a cellular level, they would have repelled each other.

They hadn't.

Despite their irrefutable similarities, their differences were, and would always be, too strong. And _that_ had created some attraction alright.

Apparently, 'unattainable' ceased to be a problem once you lost all of your inhibitions. Liv was not exactly surprised by how daring and cheeky she had become after drinking so much. What was harder to believe was how _attainable_ Olivia had gotten, and she had been completely sober.

One thing for sure, she had been in great need of relaxation, and Liv had been all too happy to help.

Still, she was fairly certain her Alternate was not going to approve of this once she woke up. Liv couldn't say she herself was _proud_ of what they'd done, but her guilt was caused by the fact that she actually _had_ a boyfriend, whom she loved very much –even if she hadn't seen him in two freaking months and it had seemed completely irrelevant a few hours ago. She had no doubt that, in the light of day, Olivia's reluctance and qualms would come back full force.

Maybe she should leave the room now, while she was still asleep. Let her wake up alone, allowing her to pretend nothing had ever happened. In a way, it was almost tempting. It sure would make a lot of things easier.

But as she stared at her sleeping face, with these strands of hair stuck to her skin where a thin layer of sweat had been glistening not so long ago, Liv could still see and _feel_ her coming undone against her, and that memory alone was enough to heat up more than just her blood.

That kind of thinking and feelings made the idea of pretending nothing had happened rather unappealing.

In any case, the time for deep reflections was coming to an abrupt end, judging by the chirping sound that was suddenly piercing the silence, a sound Liv's aching brain instantly disapproved off. She immediately recognized it, though, and knew what it was emanating from.

As Olivia's body started to uncurl and stretch, stirred from her slumber by an incoming call on her earpiece –the one Fringe Division had provided her with for the duration of the case, Liv didn't hesitate, reaching over her to grab the beeping device on the nightstand.

Her sore, hangover body did not approve of the sudden movements, but the aches didn't seem that important anymore when she realized that most of her upper body was now leaning over Olivia's, and that they were still equally naked. There was also the fact that, in a reflex motion, Olivia had sleepily and instinctively grabbed both her upper arms.

Only force of habit made Liv slip the earpiece on so swiftly, her eyes finding the hazy gaze of the woman lying beneath her as she pressed the call button.

"Dunham," she said, in a perfect imitation of her Alternate's serious greeting tone.

Most of her concentration remained focused on Olivia and ton he changes already taking place in her eyes and across her face, as she was clearly starting to realize what was happening –and what had happened.

"Olivia, this is agent Lee." Lincoln was speaking in a formal tone Liv was not familiar with anymore.

She surely would have smirked a bit at that, if Olivia hadn't started to to look all kind of freaked out beneath her, her hold on her arms tightening; pressed together as they were, Liv could even feel her breathing getting shallower.

She tried hard to pay attention to Lincoln, trying to understand why he was calling Olivia in the first place, but her throbbing head was not exactly helping. She had been in more stressful situations, though, most of them having happened when she was on mission Over Here. She thought she had figured out the reason for his call when she threw a quick glance at the clock, before promptly going back to her intense staring.

"I'm late, aren't I?" she asked, trying to sound appalled by her own behavior.

Olivia's face had now contracted in a beautiful mask of aggravation, her cheeks a bright pink again; she opened her mouth as if to say something, but Liv pressed her finger to her lips, shaking her head a little, and Olivia froze.

"We were supposed to meet at the car ten minutes ago," Lincoln admitted, and Liv was pretty sure he was smiling kindheartedly, the way he always did when he was trying to be sweet and understanding. "And I can't reach Liv either, so I thought you two might be already up together somewhere."

"No, no, we're not," Liv quickly negated, aware that had to be her best impression of Olivia she had ever done, having now actually _spent_ some quality time with the woman and having assimilated her body language.

As well as her _body_ body, really.

"But we were working on the case until pretty late last night," she added, improvising. "So it's possible she overslept, too."

As she spoke, her index finger started to move slowly over Olivia's bottom lip, truly loving the feel of the plump flesh as she toyed with it. The way it caused Olivia's blush to worsen and her breathing to hitch was even more enjoyable, and Liv was becoming more and more aware of just how bare their chests were.

"She's only a few doors down the hall, I'll go knock on her door and wake her up. We'll meet you in fifteen minutes, top. I'm _really_ sorry about this, I never oversleep, I just-"

"No need to apologize," Lincoln stopped her, and she knew he was definitely smiling, now. "I'm not even surprised you two were up working late on this, though I'm not sure it's healthy. Two workaholics like you together in a room, I find it hard to believe you got any sleep at all."

Liv would have answered with something cheeky, but Olivia definitely would not. And so she muttered a few more awkward, apologetic words, promising they would be there soon, before turning the device off.

In the last minute, Olivia's face had become rather grave again, and she was incredibly tensed under her, as if afraid to move a single inch. Liv knew she was doing her best not to openly freak out, and expected her to verbally prove it any second now.

"Get off me," Olivia finally whispered, sounding as stern as she looked.

Yep, there it was.

For a second, Liv was tempted to stay right where she was, and force her to physically move her away if she really wanted to. But Olivia seemed to be getting really mad, now, and Liv still felt pretty shitty, truth be told, and in great need of some painkillers. And so, not without a heavy sigh, she rolled off her until she was back on her side of the bed, Olivia already sitting up, quick to grab the sheet to cover herself.

For a few, endless seconds, Liv simply went back to her staring, not surprised in the least when one of Olivia's hands practically jumped to her hair, long and disheveled golden strands pouring down her bare back; with her eyes closed and the sheet clenched to her chest, she seemed to be working hard on getting a grip on herself, while Liv merely lay there, almost leisurely.

She was all too aware of how quickly Olivia's thick walls had come back. She couldn't say she was enjoying the awkwardness oozing out of her, but after all, she'd expected just that. Keeping her mouth shut surely was the wisest thing to do, right now.

Speaking would probably make things worse.

Eventually, Olivia did let go of her hair and reopened her eyes. Looking straight ahead of her, she held out a hand to Liv. "Give me the earpiece," was all she said, and she said it rather coldly.

Liv was _really_ not enjoying this at all, to be honest. And that's exactly why she smiled, not moving an inch, before replying cheekily: "You forgot the magic word."

Olivia pursed her lips, hard, finally turning her head to look at her, hand still held out. "Give me. The earpiece."

Liv had been wrong; she wasn't mad. She was _furious_.

Narrowing her eyes, she obeyed, taking the device off her ear and dropping it in Olivia's open hand. As soon as she had it, she literally jumped off the bed, angrily wrapping herself in the sheet, before bending down to pick up something. As it turned out when she threw it unceremoniously into Liv's face, it was her shirt. A second later, she was receiving her pants just as gently.

"Get dressed and get out," Olivia ordered her, already making her way to the bathroom.

But Liv was not agreeing with this in the slightest, her own annoyance strong now, causing her head to throb even more forcefully. "So that's it? You're just going to treat me like shit and pretend nothing happened?"

Olivia span around, offering her a scornful glare. "You will never get it, will you?" She almost growled. "You really think it's alright for you to just go ahead and pretend to be me whenever you feel like it?"

Liv was quite honestly taken aback by this, not immediately understanding what she meant. And when the meaning of her words finally sank in, it only caused her frown to deepen. "Is it…are you mad because of that phone call?" She almost laughed at that, but was glad she didn't when she saw the fury in Olivia's eyes.

"What do you think?" She said angrily. "You _stole my life_. You can't expect me to ever be okay with this."

Liv couldn't help it. She chuckled.

It was a humorless laugh, a pure defensive reaction, as she was now well aware that she had screwed up royally, but it was a laugh nonetheless, and Olivia looked ready to explode.

"Yeah," Liv almost snorted as she sat up, still holding her clothes in her arms, which was hardly enough to cover her. " _That,_ and the fact that it gives you the perfect excuse to throw me out of your room without even acknowledging what we did last night."

There was nothing but contempt and something close to disgust on Olivia's face when she said, shaking her head firmly. "I don't need an excuse. What happened last night was sick and wrong and _stupid_ , and the way you're acting now only reminds me just how much I don't want to have anything to do with you, ever again. I'm going to go in the bathroom now, and when I come out, you better be gone."

But Liv had had enough, stung by her words more than she would ever admit, and she was so freaking _tired_ of her behavior. For all she said, with her annoying insecurities and that darkness that seemed to follow her wherever she went, Olivia somehow always managed to sound like she was the righteous one, while Liv was nothing but an immoral bitch, and she was getting sick of her lectures.

As far as she remembered, she hadn't _forced_ her to do anything.

"Don't bother, I'll get out right now," she spat angrily, almost bouncing off the bed, and she had to scoff again when Olivia turned her head away, averting her eyes. "Oh, right, get all fucking prude on me. As if you hadn't seen _that_ body before. Isn't it why you thought this was all so wrong, last night? How we are sooo obviously the same person?"

Olivia turned her gaze back to her, and Liv had rarely seen her so infuriated. "You know what? _Fuck_ you," she said in a perfect impersonation of…well, _herself_ , before zooming to the bathroom's door.

"Guess what?" Liv almost shouted as she fought with her pants. "I just did!"

To which Olivia answered with a loud " **BANG** ", the bathroom's door closing forcefully, causing Liv's brain to nearly bleed out in pain.

She wasn't exactly sure how she found herself angrily opening the passenger's door of her car, only a few minutes later; all she knew was that she had taken the quickest shower in the world(s) and had managed to put her clothes and gun on. She had also swallowed a few pills at some point, but those had clearly not kicked in yet.

Lincoln eyed her suspiciously, obviously taken aback by whatever he was seeing. She decided to speak before he even had a chance to talk: "Move. You're driving today."

"Hello to you, too," he said with a cheeky smile, sinking into the passenger seat. "You look like hell."

"Nothing a few extra hours of sleep couldn't cure," she replied without losing a beat. "You, on the other hand, are stuck with that face for the rest of your life."

He hissed, finally moving, casually hopping onto the driver seat, and she sat down heavily in his place. It was her turn to hiss in pain when she closed her door a bit too loudly.

"Someone forgot to take their happy pills today," he kept on going as she pinched the bridge of her nose. "If I didn't know better, I would think you're hangover. Or is it just that time of the month when I'm not supposed to even talk to you?"

He was saved by the sound of another door opening in the back. He looked around to watch as Olivia got into the car; Liv kept on staring straight ahead.

"Agent Dunham," he greeted her a bit too cheerfully, surely trying to make up for Liv's disastrous mood. "Had a good night sleep?"

Liv actually had to glance at him, narrowing her eyes. He _knew_ she hadn't slept that much, according to what he had been told on the phone. And yet, he seemed genuinely inquisitive as he stared at her Alternate.

"Why do you ask?" Olivia asked just as tersely as Liv had done a minute ago, and his smile faltered a little.

"I don't know," he shrugged a bit awkwardly, surely starting to feel cornered now. "You just look more, uhm…"

Liv couldn't help it. She actually stretched her neck to look around at Olivia. She had pulled her hair up in a tight ponytail, her shirt and jacket completely buttoned up.

She still looked livid, truth be told, but Lincoln was right of course. She also looked more…

"You _definitely_ look more relaxed, agent Dunham," Liv told her sardonically. "What's your secret?"

Olivia met her gaze, then, and Liv was pretty sure even Lincoln felt the tension that imploded within the car. Because they both remembered what had relaxed her so well.

Actually, a few vivid images flashed inside Liv's head. And it wasn't just images. It was a full sensory overload of memories, from the taste of her sweaty skin to the feel of her nails in her scalp, the sound of her raspy sighs against her lips and above all, the look of blissful abandon constricting every trait of her face as she got higher and higher and _higher_.

Despite the current tension that was stiffening all of Olivia's muscles, especially those in her neck, Liv could still see indelible traces of that oblivion. Basically, she looked like someone who had just gotten spectacularly laid after a few years of nothing.

It made Liv feel quite proud…and oh so ready to make her look like that again, even if she had to use every ounce of persuasion she had in her.

She had faced trickier challenges in the past, and few had ever been so tempting.

She could tell something pretty similar was going on in Olivia's mind, judging by the blush already creeping back onto her face, or how she finally had to look away, focusing on her belt as she buckled it. "You look like hell," she told her gravely.

"Well, I didn't get much sleep last night," Liv replied in a suggestive tone, simply so that she could enjoy the sight of her darkening cheeks.

"Let me guess; you girls had another fight?"

They both turned their heated glares on Lincoln, who recoiled in his seat.

"They gave you that job because of your perspicacity, didn't they Linc?" Liv asked sarcastically. "They showed you a picture of a wormhole and you said ' _OH! That's a wormhole!_ '?"

Lincoln sighed loudly, finally turning the engine on. "You have no idea how much I miss Charlie right now," he muttered. "Two Dunhams against one is no fair game. I can tell this is going to be one of these days."

He was right about that.

...

Unsurprisingly, Liv found herself back in front of Olivia's hotel room door less than twenty-four hours after having strutted there the first time, drunk as can be.

She wasn't drunk, tonight. She was actually pretty sure that she had reached a mood that was the perfect opposite of drunk.

She was still obviously suffering from her hangover, and their day of work had hardly been productive enough, something neither Olivia Dunham ever approved of, even on a good day. Needless to say that by the time they got back to the hotel, Lincoln just about flew out the car –and yet, somehow, Olivia managed to escape it even faster.

Liv, being her usual self –even after almost twelve hours of hell, followed her quite closely into the entrance hall, but Olivia beat her to the elevator.

Their eyes briefly met as the doors were closing, one of Olivia's hands already up to the back of her head as she freed her hair from the ponytail holder. Liv could tell that meeting her gaze hadn't been intentional, seeing how she had been especially good at _not_ doing it all day long, but the result was the same.

For that unguarded, two-seconds long stare followed Liv back to her room, refusing to let her be as she took a lengthy shower, and now was undoubtedly the reason why she was knocking on Olivia's door again, hair still dripping and slowly drenching the back of her shirt.

This was ridiculous. They were both adults, _smart_ adults; she refused to believe they couldn't behave any other way than with this stupid, tensed bickering. Of course, this was how she rationalized and justified her presence here.

The less rational reason had everything to do with that stupid tension, indeed.

Also, she was a daredevil. An _impulsive_ daredevil. And when her gut was telling her to do something, well, she rarely fought against her instincts.

Predictably, Olivia did not open the door, although Liv was sure she was now standing on the other side, surely looking stubbornly moody.

And so she knocked again. And again. And _again_ , until the door finally opened abruptly. Olivia kept it mostly closed, as if making sure Liv wouldn't try and force her way in, like she had done the previous night. Liv was still able to see enough of her to notice that Olivia had just escaped the shower herself, wrapped in nothing but a robe, her hair even wetter than hers.

Even though it wasn't _that_ uncommon for people to shower after a tense day of work, Liv still couldn't help but smile a little at this obvious similarity.

Olivia, of course, did not smile.

"What do you want?" She asked as coldly as ever, and Liv shrugged a shoulder.

"I just want to talk," she honestly answered...but they both remembered how she had just come here to 'talk' the night before, and how somehow, it had led to something that did not require that much talking.

What she was thinking about must have been showing on her face –she couldn't exactly control it- because sure enough, Olivia's cheeks were getting slightly pinker already. But she didn't move or said a word, looking at her suspiciously, eyes narrowed.

"I'm not drunk or anything," Liv sighed. "I just figured we could actually act like adults and talk about what happened. But if you would rather sulk, then fine. Close the door in my face and keep on ignoring me."

Olivia's glare darkened; she knew she was cornered. Because if she did close the door and refused to let her in, then she would be the one behaving immaturely.

And God forbid she would ever let that happen.

Eventually, after a few more seconds of staring and glowering, she moved aside to let her in. Liv didn't miss the fact that she didn't stay near the door after closing it, and she had to repress another smile.

She watched as Olivia positioned herself a good few feet away, arms tightly wrapped in front of her chest, her robe wrapped even more tightly around her body. Not for the first time, Liv found herself wondering how she managed to get _that_ tense so quickly, because she doubted she had ever achieved such stiffness herself.

Now more than ever, she felt the urge to make her loosen up again. After all, she had seen firsthand just how loose she could get.

But Liv knew she should act wisely and cautiously. She could tell Olivia was already more affected by her presence than she let it show. It was rather entertaining to watch her, as she clearly didn't really know where to look; she was still avoiding her gaze, but also seemed unwilling to look at the bed, for obvious reasons. She settled for staring stubbornly at the floor, lips pursed.

"What are you so freaked out about?" Liv finally asked softly, realizing that honesty surely was the safest option.

Olivia briefly met her gaze, and she narrowed her eyes again. Somehow, she managed to tighten the hold on herself. "What do you think?"

"Oh c'mon," Liv said, her hand swooping in front of her a bit exasperatedly. "We've covered this last night. Stop beating yourself up thinking this is all _wrong_."

"And _you_ should stop pretending you don't think it is," Olivia replied annoyingly, now starting to pace again. "You were all too keen to point it out this morning."

"This morning, I was pissed off," Liv retorted, and she sounded pretty pissed off again. She couldn't help it. No matter how much she wanted to stay calm, or how understanding she was trying to be, watching Olivia pace like that, being nothing but a ball of nerves, was extremely infectious. "I only said that because I knew it would make you react."

"Again, such a mature thing to do," Olivia said contemptuously, stopping her pacing to scowl at her. "This must be so hilarious to you, isn't it? To have me cornered like that."

"Oh yeah, I'm obviously laughing my ass off," she snapped back. "Why won't stop being your paranoid self for a minute? Can't you just see this as, I don't know, a drunken one night stand?"

"I wasn't drunk!" Olivia shouted quite forcefully, and shocking them both by doing so.

She seemed almost taken aback by her own words, as if she finally understood what the problem was, her face constricted in annoyance and a bunch of other conflicting feelings. She held her gaze though, as she shook her head.

"That's the thing. _You_ were drunk. _You_ have the perfect excuse. I have nothing. I can't explain what happened."

Liv sighed, her shoulders slumping, now seeing clearly beyond Olivia's angry demeanor. She now looked more embarrassed than aggravated as she carefully avoided her gaze again, her cheeks a bright pink.

"You know," Liv told her tranquilly. "Technically, it was nothing more than…self-gratification."

As she expected, Olivia met her eyes again, and she definitely was not amused. "Are you kidding me?"

"What?" Liv shrugged. "Don't tell me you haven't thought of it that way yet."

Olivia unwrapped her arms, briefly bringing a hand to her face to wipe her nose, eyes closed, before running her fingers through her wet hair. When she reopened her eyes, she looked more tired than anything else. At least, some of her tension was gone.

"I can't reply anything to that," Olivia admitted, resigned. "Whatever it was, it's over."

Liv stared at her intensely. "Is it?"

The effect was instantaneous. The tension had been there from the moment she had opened the door and they started interacting, but Olivia had been so guarded that it had remained to a low pulse, like small static electricity humming in the room.

Now, as they stood there with their eyes locked, it was as if someone had turned the power all the way up.

"Don't," Olivia said after a few long seconds of heavy silence, and her voice was slightly hoarse.

But Liv took a step forward her, half expecting her to take a step back…but she didn't. Liv couldn't help a small smirk from pulling at the corner of her lips. "I'll leave this room right now, and leave you alone, if you honestly tell me that you didn't enjoy it."

She couldn't lie; she truly loved watching Olivia react to her words, ever since she'd realized the night before that they were the source of her power, in this situation.

Liv could be very good with words.

Olivia's breathing was already getting shallower, and Liv could almost hear the sound of her heartbeat quickening, knew how it would feel, how it would pulse against her lips if she pressed her mouth to her jugular.

Olivia remained still as Liv kept on advancing towards her, very similarly to the way they had started to 'dance' the previous night. "You really think this is going to work again?"

Liv's smile widened, as they both knew Olivia had just discarded her easy way out, apparently unable to lie. "You tell me…" Liv taunted her, still coming closer and closer. "We're both sober this time. Do you think it's going to change anything?"

"You think too highly of yourself," Olivia replied with an annoyed glare…but she still hadn't moved an inch, even though Liv was now coming to a stop right in front her. "You're delusional if you think I'm going to let you touch me."

Without even blinking, Liv grabbed the belt of her robe, and pulled slightly to bring her closer, curious to see if she was going to push her away, indeed.

She did not.

Olivia's pupils dilated instead, her breathing hitching as their bodies brushed.

"Stop being so hard on yourself," Liv told her in a low voice, as her fingers slowly started to work on the knot. "You're enjoying this, just admit it."

"I could stop you," Olivia insisted, sounding slightly breathless now. She was still being very unsuccessful at even _trying_ to stop her.

Liv didn't smile, holding her gaze firmly as her hands kept on working on her belt, which was now completely loosened. "Do you know why you don't? Why you're not even trying?" She spoke almost in a whisper, her fingers now intent on getting her robe to open up for her, purposefully taking her time, well aware of how much effect she was having. "It's because it's easier to resist something tempting when you've never tried it. Once you've given in, though…" Her hands had disappeared inside the robe, grazing the skin of her lower back with light fingertips, goose-bumps erupting under her touch. "You can't stop thinking about how good it felt, and it's _so_ hard to stop…"

Olivia's hands had fallen on her hips, and her grip was firm, as if she was suspended in doubt, unsure of what she should do…push her away, or bring her closer?

"Stop it…" She whispered, and their faces were so close now that Liv could feel her breath on her skin, inhaling the smell of her shampoo with every intake of breath.

Liv decidedly slid her hands lower, over the ridiculously smooth skin of her ass, squeezing the flesh and bringing her much closer, and Olivia gasped soundlessly. "Stop me," she breathed against her lips.

Instead of stopping her, one of Olivia's hands left her waist and came up to her face, sliding her fingers through her wet hair, and soon, the feel of her nails digging in her scalp combined with the feel of her lips meeting hers with delicious urgency.

Liv had briefly wondered throughout the day if the alcohol she'd drunk had been the reason why _this_ had felt so outrageously good. Because everything had felt easier while she was drunk; it had taken the edges off, giving the world a shimmering glow. Everything had felt blurry, everything but her.

Liv was sober as can be now, and _she_ was still luscious. Tonight, her sharp mind made Liv that much more aware of every detail that had been blurred out the last time. Very quickly, she started to feel like she was getting intoxicated again. She was getting drunk on the feel of her, on her taste.

Olivia's robe was wide open now, hanging off her shoulders, and shivers ran endlessly under her skin, following the path of Liv's fingers and palms, and the scent of her was so warm and enticing. Liv could feel herself react just as strongly to Olivia's touch, more assertive than it had ever been so far; her hand had left her face to join the other under her shirt, mirroring her caresses as Olivia pressed her bare flesh more and more firmly against her, their kissing becoming more avid by the second.

None of them expected the _knock_ that suddenly resonated in the room, causing Olivia to jump away from Liv as if she had been electrocuted.

For a fleeting, hazy second, they just stared at each other, their breathing loud and uneven. And then there was another knock, and Olivia seemed to snap out of it, hurriedly wrapping her robe close again as she made a beeline for the door, seeming a bit wobbly on her legs. She practically crashed against the wood as she pressed an eye to the peephole, before looking back at Liv, apparently horrified by what she had just seen.

"It's Lincoln," she breathed out, already looking ready to have a real nervous breakdown.

Straightening her shirt casually, Liv simply offered her a cocky smile before joining her at the door. Olivia was so in shock that she hardly reacted when Liv pushed her aside.

"What are you-"

But she didn't finish her sentence, the door opening already.

The expression on Lincoln's face was almost comical. He clearly hadn't expected this Olivia to greet him. He opened his mouth, a bit at a loss for words, and then he frowned. "Don't tell me you were working on the case again. I don't know if you've noticed, but that usually leads to the two of you fighting, and I don't want it to end in murder."

Liv chuckled, leaning casually against the door. "Nah, we decided to kiss and make up instead, but you kinda interrupted us."

Olivia literally swooped in front of her then, her turn to push her away as she grabbed the side of the door to hide most of the room –even though there was nothing to hide, really. "Hi, Lincoln," She said a bit too cheerfully, despite being clearly livid.

Lincoln gave her a look. "You don't happen to share her twisted sense of humor, do you?" He asked a bit warily, and Olivia shook her head, offering him a fake smile, her arms now tightly crossed in front of her chest again.

"No, I really don't." She answered, still sounding a bit breathless.

"There might still be hope for one of you,then," he said with a small smile, though he still looked a bit perplexed, surely wondering what the heck was going on.

"We were uhm…just going to brainstorm on the case some more," Olivia felt the need to say, her pallor turning back into a blush already. "She literally got here five minutes ago…I was in the shower."

"No need to brainstorm any longer," Lincoln said then, deciding not to over-think this, to Olivia's obvious relief. "The new samples we found today and sent back to the lab? We finally got a match; we know where our guy is. You two should get dressed, I'll wait for you in the car."

"That's great news," Olivia said, her relief apparent now, and Liv knew that it wasn't only the Agent talking. Lincoln didn't move, looking at Liv, obviously waiting for her to join him in the hallway. "Give us a minute," Olivia added then. "We have one more thing to talk about." And she closed the door without even giving him a chance to say anything else.

She gave Liv her darkest look as soon as the door was closed. "Why the hell did you say that for?"

She didn't even wait for an answer, already reaching for her clothes.

"Oh please, he's completely oblivious," Liv chuckled. "I can assure you he would still have believed your lame excuse if he had interrupted us in the middle of-"

"Stop," Olivia said firmly, arms full of clothes. "We're closing this case tonight, and I'll go back to my world. Next time we have to work together, _this_ never happened, and won't ever happen again. Does that sound like a reasonable option to you?"

Liv held her gaze for a few seconds, then shrugged. "Sure."

"I mean it," Olivia insisted. "This never happened."

"I get it," Liv nodded. "It never happened, won't happen again, yadda yadda."

"Why do I get the feeling you don't mean it?"

Liv tilted her head. "I do mean it. I just don't think you do."

Olivia sighed exasperatedly, briefly closing her eyes. "Just…go get dressed, so we can get this over with." And as Liv turned around to open the door again, she added: "And I _do_ mean it."

"Okay, then," Liv said with a casual wave, not even turning around as she left her room. She offered Lincoln a smirk as she closed the door, before starting down the hall to go back to her room, strutting a little again. He quickly joined her, matching her pace.

"You know, I think you should give her a break," he told her a bit disapprovingly. "I know you enjoy bickering with her, but I really think it would be better for everybody if in the future, you didn't purposefully make her mad. You guys honestly scare me."

She had to chuckle at that, shaking her head. "Just admit it, you just wish Charlie was here so you two could bet on us ending up in mud fight or something." They had reached her door. She turned towards him, and he was smiling, too.

"You know me too well," he admitted with a defeated shrug. "Still, I think she deserves a break. Her life seems more stressful than yours."

Liv decided to ignore that comment. There was only one person with whom she was willing to debate on the matter, and Lincoln wasn't that person.

"Fine," she agreed, opening her door. "I promise I'll let her be."

After all, that was all Olivia wanted as well.

The next time they saw each other, Liv would be as professional as can be, more professional than she had ever behaved around her. No more teasing, or flirting, and definitely no innuendos about what had happened here.

Because she could bet anything that before the end of their next joined case, Olivia would be the one seeking her out.

And she couldn't wait to see just how right she was about that.


	4. Part Four

The warmth was everywhere.

It surrounded her. Enveloped her. Invaded her so mercilessly that it had to be coming out of her pores, now, adding power to that heat in which she was already trapped. Except that she did not have pores, not exactly. She had no skin, no flesh, no bones; not here, not in this suspended space, in this timeless moment.

Olivia was bodiless.

She was bodiless, and yet, the sensations were definitely there, both real and ethereal, and she could do nothing but feel. Her mind was at peace, here; there was no worries, no question, no thought at all.

She was dreaming of him.

She was dreaming of him, and for the time being, she was oblivious to the fact that it was all it was. A dream. For the time being, she was his, entirely, unequivocally, responding to his ghostly touch so strongly that it was almost eerie; it was as if he had marked her, in another life maybe, in such ways that even in this intangible place, something in her recognized him, craved for him.

He was neither here nor there, this beautiful phantom of hers, and yet, she felt him wholly.

Whenever she focused on the feel of him, what had been impalpable an instant before suddenly gained substance. She felt his heated skin hovering hers. He was the warmth enveloping her, and the way he moved upon her was responsible for the liquefaction of her every cell.

_Olivia…_

Her own name caressed her ear in a soft, echoing murmur, as his hands caressed her skin, and the warmth pooled deeper for a moment, before it spread once more, everything losing substance again; flesh turned into cotton, and the blue of his eyes dispersed, tinting the bright light surrounding her. And she did not mind waiting for that instant when she would feel him under her palms again, content to simply keep on drifting away soundlessly into the mist…

…until the mist evaporated suddenly, and all of that heat found itself trapped beneath her skin again.

A new set of hands was traveling over her curves, in a way that felt anything but ghostly. This…this was not the echo of a memory she had once lived, somewhere, somehow. This was new, recent, authentic, engraved in a part of her brain that had always been so incredibly gifted at remembering every single detail.

Numbers or sensations, it made no distinction, keeping everything. It was there for her to take, and right now, she was taking it all, giving substance to the body slithering over hers, as well as to the mattress beneath her. Unable to keep still under this myriad of new signals overwhelming her nerves, she was rippling under that warm body, soft linen rubbing against her skin, toes clenching the sheet untangled between her feet. A very specific scent, musky, sweet, _feminine_ , was the next thing to come, along with the silky feeling of hair brushing her chest, eliciting instant recognition from her entire being. Next thing she knew, her hardened nipple was being entrapped between two wet lips, then torturously teased by one expert tongue.

Olivia's body arched, and she moaned without restrain.

_Olivia…_

The name that now resonated in her head and against her shivering skin wasn't simply a quiet call anymore; it was an answer, an identity, a reality.

But when she opened her eyes, her head still thrown back from that delicious rush that had just coursed her body, her gaze was recaptured by a familiar color.

Blue.

He was back, every trait of his face more distinct than they had ever been before, even though she was staring at him upside down. She instinctively unclenched her fists, letting go of the linen beneath her and raising her hands. She reached out for him, until her fingers were touching him, feeling him, and her heart bled within her chest. His name was still a mystery, and yet, she could almost taste it on her tongue; she used to know it, know him.

She pulled his face down to her without hesitation, craving for the taste of his lips if she couldn't get his name; she pulled him hard into a lopsided kiss, with so much force that their teeth clashed and she did not care, her nails digging hard into his neck and scalp as she fed on his tongue. She was extremely well aware of the fact that another tongue was still at work, as the scorching mouth on her chest hadn't gone anywhere, claiming her attention with its raw keenness.

Somehow, the kisses it was scattering on her skin as it travelled downwards, down down down over the heated pool of her stomach and then beyond, still felt more real than the lips she was feasting on. And when that tongue attacked her most sensitive spot right where her legs met, she became possessed; one of her hands instantly fell from the man's nape to sink into the flames, clenching that vibrant hair into a death grip as if her life depended on it, and she rippled and arched once more, her moans swallowed by her ghost's lips.

The warmth was absolute and ruthless, too overpowering, shattering every ounce of perception she ever had in that dreamscape, bringing her higher, higher, _higher_ , until-

Olivia's phone biped loudly on her nightstand, vibrating just as annoyingly, and it successfully and abruptly put an end to her dream.

For a few very confused seconds, she simply lay there, her body tensed and immobile, if not for the unsteady rises and falls of her chest as she tried to catch her breath, her mind still entangled in what was left of her dream. As she started to move a moment later, she realized that her mind wasn't the only thing entangled, her legs imprisoned in the sheets in the weirdest ways. The excessive sensitivity of her skin reminded her all too well that it had all felt way too real, leaving her successfully worked up and unsatisfied.

_Again_.

The fact that she had been dreaming of her mysterious man wasn't anything new in itself; ever since the creation of the Bridge, he had been invading her mind more times than she could count. What was quite disturbing however was the way it had gone from fairly innocent visions to full blown fantasies. It did not take a genius to understand what had triggered the change, or what her subconscious was telling her rather loudly, especially when it invited _someone else_ to the party.

Nearly a month had passed since her last trip Over There and that night of…insanity with her Alternate.

She had of course done everything she could to make herself forget it had ever happened, but no matter how hard she tried, when her mind was the most vulnerable at night, she couldn't keep the red haired woman from finding her…and the worst part of it all was that Olivia very rarely protested when it happened, her body aching for what she had savored a few weeks ago.

And as if she were punishing herself for that yearning she shouldn't be having, these dreams systematically stopped before she could find any relief whatsoever. Some might have taken care of that problem on their own –she was a grown woman, after all, she knew how these things worked; it would be so easy to give in, in the secrecy of her shower where she always ended up after such dreams for example, to let her hands do what others, perfectly alike, had done so skillfully, having ignited a fire within her that still refused to burn out. Instead, it only seemed to be gaining power with every passing day and every restless night.

But that was exactly why Olivia never caved. She refused to let this warped desire gets the best of her, ever again.

Needless to say, she was becoming rather tense.

Finally remembering what had stopped her dream from unfolding so nicely in the first place, she grabbed her phone, and wasn't surprised to find a text message from Broyles.

' _Please call ASAP. New development on the Ederson case.'_

Sighing heavily, she immediately dialed his number, even though she knew it couldn't be another murder or he would have called himself. As she waited for him to pick up, she absent-mindedly ran a hand over the sweaty skin of her forehead, now longing for that shower. Among other things.

Broyles went straight to the point without even a hello.

"As you know, the files provided to us from the Other Side are still being processed to this day. As it turned out, we've just found out that they had a similar case less than two years ago."

"Does that mean we need to go Over There again?" she asked as professionally as she could, even though she felt anything but professional right now. The idea of taking a trip there was less than appealing at the moment, and it wasn't the four hours' drive to New York that was putting her off.

"That won't be necessary. I talked to my counterpart, and since we helped them out last month, he agreed to send the Agent who worked on the case our way."

"Who worked on the case?" Olivia asked, grimacing, the heel of hand now pressed hard against her eye; she was really hoping he would utter Lincoln Lee's name, but she already knew what his answer would be.

"Your Alternate," Broyles did reply, flatly. He had been aware from the very beginning of this 'collaboration' that the Dunhams had a very complex and difficult relationship, knowing how it had all started –Olivia's life being stolen by the other woman, among other things. However, he had obviously not been informed of the latest developments between the two of them. "Look, I know how you feel about working with her, but her insight might help you break the case."

"It's…fine," Olivia lied through her teeth, trying to ignore the fact that her heart was already beating faster at the simple thought that she would have to face _her_ soon, causing her to feel the strangest mix of trepidation and some unmistakable anticipation. "I can deal with her for a day."

There was pause, then. It was a short one, but it was definitely there. "Actually, it has already been arranged that she will be staying for the duration of the case, as long as it might take."

Olivia reopened her eyes, hand falling back on the mattress. "I thought we were on a low budget," she said, sounding more like a grumpy child than a FBI agent now. "Lincoln and I are handling this, sir. I appreciate their help, but we don't need one of their agents to-"

"Olivia," Broyles reprimanded her, almost sternly. "Your Alternate _solved_ that case. She has information you undoubtedly need. If you two work together, it might only take a couple of days. And since you're worrying so much about our budget, you'll be glad to learn that you're going to let her stay at your place while she's here. If people ask, you can always say she's your twin sister, it might prevent them from asking too many questions."

Twin sisters.

Even though the dream had mostly faded away, the way dreams always do in the light of day, too much of it remained in Olivia's mind, and her body was still displaying obvious and almost painful signs of its successful build up and unsatisfying conclusion. Whatever they were or had become, twin sisters couldn't be farther away from it.

She found herself hoping that the other woman involved wouldn't make this harder than it already promised to be.

... 

As it turned out, Liv made things unexpectedly easy.

Trying to get on her nerves actually seemed to be the farthest thing on her mind. In order for Liv to give Olivia any inappropriate look at all, she would have had _to look at her_ in the first place, something she seemed decided on not doing much anymore. It wasn't that she looked uncomfortable in any way about being around Olivia, or was feeling somewhat uneasy about what had happened between them on their last encounter, maybe –again, this kind of awkwardness simply seemed completely alien to Liv. Her behavior was much worse. To Olivia, it very much looked like her Alternate had now decided to fiercely ignore her. And she should have been glad about this, _relieved_ , even.

Unfortunately, Olivia was not. At all.

Liv had entered the lab in the early hours of the day, swaging her way in like she owned the place; Olivia had been standing as straight as can be at one of the tables, shirt and jacket buttoned all the way up, with her hair trapped in a tight bun. When she had gotten dressed after Broyles' call, she had told herself that the sterner she looked, the less likely her double would be to eye her like she had done so many times in the past, or to make any witty comment.

Mostly, she had just wanted to conceal every inch of her body under layers and layers of tight clothes, hoping that it would put an end to the constant boiling of her cells, fearing that only one look at her would be enough for Liv to know just how successful she had been at _not_ forgetting that night.

But when the moment came and Liv made her apparition, swooping in like a blazing angel, she merely glanced at Olivia, nodding her head politely, almost indifferently. She went straight for Lincoln, then, flashing him a bright grin and offering him a cheerful hello that had him stuttering embarrassingly within seconds, not to mention the way he started readjusting his glasses. Repeatedly. This gesture became almost a twitch as the day went by, Special Agent Olivia Dunham having apparently decided that she should invade his personal space any chance she got, all the while pretending that the other, more disgruntled Olivia Dunham wasn't even in the room, unless their research forced them to interact verbally.

On top of flirting with Lincoln obnoxiously –there really was no other word for what she was doing, Liv also seemed decided to get into Walter's good graces, despite the fact that the old man managed to seem even less pleased than Olivia by the attitude of the red haired woman.

If their day of work had been packed with action and thrilling leads, maybe she wouldn't have felt so bothered by all of this. Regrettably, FBI work wasn't always all about car chases and gun fires like the movies depicted it to be; research and paperwork were a big part of it, and as they had to compare both their cases and try to find a break through, they spent most of the day trapped in the lab, going over piles of documents.

Olivia tried to imitate her Alternate's behavior. After all, she _had_ told her the previous month in that hotel room that they should act as if nothing had ever happened. She simply never expected Liv to be such a good actress. In retrospect, she shouldn't be so shocked; Liv had proven in the past that she could pretend all right. But for reasons she could not explain, Olivia was beyond annoyed as she watched the other woman tease Walter with her smiles and some sweets, or observed how she laughed at Lincoln's dumb jokes.

As the day grew darker, however, so did everyone's mood. Olivia had secluded herself in her office a long time ago, but she could hear Walter's remarks getting nastier and nastier. In turn, Liv's frequent laughter started to fade away, and by the time a migraine was starting to settle in the back of Olivia's head, letting her know that she was more than ready to go home, it was clear that the whole team was glad to see this day end.

The drive back to Olivia's place was long and silent, the kind of silence that was anything but comfortable. Every time she dared a glance sideways, Liv was stubbornly looking out the window, face turned away. Having absolutely no idea what she could say, and not remotely in the mood to try anyway, Olivia finally accepted the fact that this forced 'collaboration' was going to be hell, and that she'd just have to go with it.

The only words they exchanged that evening were spoken upon arriving at her apartment.

"I would give you a tour of the place, but I'm sure you remember where everything is."

Olivia was tired, achy, (needy) and moody, and judging by the unamused look this remark earned her, so was Liv.

"Yeah, that would have surprised me if you had spontaneously decided to redecorate everything and made this place nicer."

"You're sleeping on the couch. You remember where the sheets are, too, don't you?"

"Sure, next to your stash of whiskey. I'll help myself."

"I'm sure you will."

And that was about it.

... 

Olivia couldn't sleep. Not that it surprised her in the least.

Even though the day had been essentially eventless, she was now feelings both aggravated and more than a little mortified.

It was embarrassing, to know that she had just spent the last few weeks of her life having all these unorthodox thoughts about someone who had apparently managed to successfully move on. And why wouldn't she move on? Olivia had known right away, that night in her hotel room, that she was nothing more than a challenge to Liv; the woman was a daredevil and a thrill-seeker.

Olivia had been this unattainable pray -even though in retrospect, she had become attainable ridiculously easily.

And it was all so ironic and predictable. Olivia had been foolishly worrying about having to deal with her Alternate's perseverance , trying to persuade herself that she wouldn't give in, not ever again; as it turned out, she was now obsessing over the fact that she wasn't being pursued at all.

Tossing and turning in a bed that had witnessed too many of her fantasies lately while the object of her inner battles was herself resting in the adjacent room was not helping in the least.

Olivia had retreated in her bedroom as soon as she was done showering, leaving the French doors slightly ajar, with the sole purpose of keeping an ear on whatever Liv was doing in her place. That's how she knew she had showered herself –obviously remembering where everything was indeed. The annoyed opening and closing of her cupboards and fridge also meant she had tried to find some edible food. She had settled down eventually, and everything had been quiet for a few hours, now. Olivia couldn't know for certain that Liv was asleep, but if she weren't, she would have been moving around, the woman unable to stay still.

Her eyes kept going back to her alarm clock, watching the numbers slowly change, minutes after minutes, hours after hours. It was nearing 2am when the strangest sound pierced the complete silence that had taken over her whole apartment.

It was the sound of a loud, raspy and almost panicked intake of air, instantly followed by even louder and definitely ragged breathing.

Olivia had tensed up in the middle of her bed, now solely focused on these sounds; it seemed obvious that Liv had just awoken abruptly from what had to be a bad dream. To say that she was _concerned_ would be a bit of an exaggeration, but she was most definitely intrigued, now.

Liv seemed to get a grip on herself rather quickly, though, as silence fell back surprisingly fast; either that, or she was doing a very good job at masking her distress. And indeed, less than two minutes had passed when more noises reached Olivia's room, Liv moving around the kitchen again apparently, and soon, a very faint light came through the gap between her doors.

Olivia knew she should let her be. She knew that if Liv was nearly as affected as she had been a month ago, she certainly wouldn't want to be seen by anyone, least of all the person she had been ignoring all day. That's exactly why Olivia kicked her covers away and slipped out of the room nearly thirty seconds later.

Liv was still in the kitchen, standing there at the counter in her light PJs, her hair a dark mass over her back in the dim light of the room. Judging by what Olivia could see, she had _indeed_ remembered where to find her stash of whiskey.

She stared at her Alternate's back, frowning in puzzlement more than anything else. Obviously, she knew that despite her claims about hating alcohol, Liv could drink and get drunk just like anyone else, but she also knew that it was somewhat of an extreme measure in her case.

"What are you doing?" Olivia asked her, maybe more coldly than she intended to, but she couldn't exactly help it, still not over the way she had disregarded her all day.

Liv finished pouring her drink, putting the bottle back down on the counter with a _clang!_ , not even bothering turning around to look at her as she answered with her own question. "What does it look like I'm doing?"

Even though her tone was definitely matching hers in annoyance, there also was an odd quality to her voice, something Olivia recognized immediately, but she wanted to discard the thought right away, as it was almost preposterous. Nonetheless, she found herself walking further into the kitchen to try and get a better look at her.

Sensing her approaching more than seeing her, Liv brought a swift hand to her face, in an unmistakable swiping gesture.

"Are you… _crying_?" Olivia was genuinely shocked. The question was pointless, as it was more than obvious that she was, and undoubtedly had been ever since she had woken up.

Maybe she shouldn't be so surprised; after all, Liv had admitted last month having cried prior to getting so ridiculously drunk. But hearing about it and seeing some traces of tears that had long dried was very different from actually witnessing it.

Liv's reply was nothing but a humorless chuckle as she brought the glass to her lips; she took a long gulp of it, grimacing in blunt disgust as the liquid went down her throat, her wet cheeks glistening in the soft light she had turned on over the counter.

When her face relaxed again, or at least a little, she spoke again, keeping her eyes closed, and her voice was undeniably icy this time when she said: "Just fuck off."

To say that Olivia did not take it well would be an understatement.

What little unease and unavoidable empathy she had felt toward her Alternate's distress instantly shattered, dissolved away by the acid now burning the base of her throat as indignation took over her. She had known that confronting her when she was in such a vulnerable and uncharacteristically exposed state wouldn't be wise, at all. Dunham women didn't like being caught in moments of weakness, and they knew how to bite.

Understanding where that remark had come from didn't excuse it in the least, however, and that was why Olivia walked closer to the counter, almost daring Liv to look at her, her arms now tightly crossed in front of her chest in a defensive and irate stance.

"Are you kidding me?" she said, not even trying to hide her aggravation. "Are you seriously telling me to _fuck off_ from my own kitchen?"

Liv made another face then, looking as if she was very _bored_ with her, and when she finally reopened her eyes to meet her gaze, she offered her a tired, fed up look. "Of course not," she said softly, and she would almost have sounded sincere if her tone of voice hadn't also been absolutely disdainful. "I wouldn't _dare_ offend you in such way, not in your own kitchen. Your kitchen, your rules."

As it was to be expected, Olivia's anger went up a notch. She held her gaze with furious intensity, now standing face to face as they scowled at each other.

"You really got some nerves," Olivia glowered at her. "So you've really decided you should act like a bitch for the entire duration of the case, haven't you?"

This earned her another grim chuckle; Liv shook her head almost mockingly, briefly biting down her lip, and with her next look, she seemed to be gauging her with derision, a nasty, knowing smile on her lisps. "If I didn't know better, I would say you're upset because I didn't pay enough attention to you today. Which would be unsurprisingly hypocritical of you, knowing how you were the one who insisted so much on the fact that we should act like ' _nothing ever happened'_."

Olivia was pretty sure she was grimacing very unattractively now, but she didn't care much; once again, her Alternate had managed to piss her off beyond belief. The fact that her entire body was reacting to their verbal joust was even more infuriating. She chose to ignore the fast drum of her heart, though, as well as the fast heating blood in her veins.

"This has nothing to do with me," she replied with contempt. "It has become clear that you're trying to make your way through my entire team. Judging by the way you behaved today, you surely would have preferred to be at Lincoln's right now, so you could play drunk with him, too, and add him to your list."

Liv's entire body became very stiff, and what little color had been on her face just disappeared. She looked almost detached as she slowly put her glass down on the counter. She never took her eyes away from hers, though. "So, calling me a bitch isn't nearly enough, uh?" She said, her voice so cold now that it could have drained all warmth from Olivia's bones. Almost. "Now you're calling me a whore?"

Olivia shrugged slowly, smiling a very unattractive smirk. "I'm just looking at the evidence. You've said it yourself, you don't really care about what others see as, and I quote, ' _morally wrong_ '."

It happened very fast.

Liv moved, walking forward and literally swooping on her. Only pure instinct made Olivia back away, reacting to the murderous glare in her Alternate's eyes. That's how she found herself having backed off so much and so fast that her back hit the door of her fridge with enough force to make the whole thing shake behind her. A split second later, Liv's palm was slamming the cold metal, very close to her head, nothing but an inch separating both their bodies and faces, now.

Olivia had momentarily forgotten how to breathe, trapped once more between her body and a door, between warmth and cold, her heart beating so fast and pounding so frantically that she could feel it pulse in the tip of her fingers as well as deep within. She was trapped, trapped in that darkened shade of green, trapped in eyes with reddened rims and wet eyelashes, and these uneven breaths of air that scorched her lips at rapid speed.

"I'm fucking tired of your self-righteousness," Liv almost growled in a low whisper, her second hand coming up to rest just as firmly on the fridge on the other side of Olivia's head. "You and I both know you're not exactly as white as snow, here."

White as snow, Olivia was certainly not. Nor would she want to be at that instant, the last few weeks of bottled up frustration emerging incredibly fast as she felt her body so close to hers and yet refused to yield so hastily. And just like she had imagined, she knew Liv could now read it all on her face, see it all in her eyes.

She could see how raw and eager she had left her, how much she hated her for it, how much she craved for _more_.

Once again, they seemed to mirror each other perfectly.


	5. Part Five

"I'm fucking tired of your self-righteousness," Liv almost growled in a low whisper, her second hand coming up to rest just as firmly on the fridge on the other side of Olivia's head. "You and I both know you're not exactly as white as snow, here."

White as snow, Olivia was certainly not. Nor would she want to be at that instant, the last few weeks of bottled up frustration emerging incredibly fast as she felt her body so close to hers and yet refused to yield so hastily. And just like she had imagined, she knew Liv could now read it all on her face, see it all in her eyes.

She could see how raw and eager she had left her, how much she hated her for it, how much she craved for _more_.

Once again, they seemed to mirror each other perfectly.

In that suspended instant, a lot was being said without any word needing to be shared out loud. There was a battle of the minds and bodies happening, there, both acutely aware of the sizzling tension that surrounded them, as if the air had become utterly charged with static electricity. Olivia still held onto her need to resist, while Liv's pride acted like a barrier, obviously highly disliking to be treated that way when she had already put herself in a weak position by displaying her puzzling distress.

There was a constant game going on between them, a never ending competition, and right now, Liv might have the upper hand, physically speaking, having entrapped her that way against the fridge, but psychologically, Olivia thought she might actually win that round, for once.

She wasn't the one who still had tears glistening on her cheeks.

That was why she chose to speak instead of act, chose to press harder on the bruise that had made Liv react so strongly rather than succumb to the yearning in her guts.

"One of us has to be the self-righteous one," she said in a haughty whisper she knew would make Liv's skin crawl. "Seeing how we share the same genetic code, part of me really wants to believe you've got some of my moral code, too, maybe just slightly different…but all you do is walk around my world and interact with my people as if you hadn't done anything wrong. If you want me to respect you, start by showing me you've got even an ounce of integrity."

Close as they were, Olivia saw her eyes darken even more, her breathing halting briefly, and there was a flash of something very primeval and raw across her face, which made her think that Liv's next retort would definitely be physical. Maybe she would slap her, which would lead them to have their second real fight; maybe she would pull her hair and tell her to shut up, as if they were two infuriated school girls. Or maybe she would grab her face in her hands, crash her mouth upon hers and pin her fully to the fridge, crash her flesh and bones against the cold door until Olivia moaned her defeat.

Any of these three would do at this point, because the ending would be the same, inevitable, awaited, longed for.

But none of them happened at all.

Liv's entire body language suddenly changed, then, unexpectedly, and the strangest look crossed her face as she moved her head away, as if responding to some kind of call. She definitely looked like she was hearing something. And that something caused her to swiftly push herself away from the fridge, muttering another swear word under her breath, one of her hands already up to her face.

Left standing there alone against the fridge, feeling more than a little shaky in many ways, Olivia could do nothing but stare at her Alternate's back, both of them trying to get a hold on their emotions, even though they were clearly not of the same kind. She wanted to stay mad at Liv, but she was a little too intrigued now –not to mention worked up, to gather up the strength to remain angry. Instead, she decided to quietly keep on observing her double, as Liv walked back to the counter; she also used this sudden moment of respite to try and regain full control over her body, taking deep and slow intakes of breath.

Apparently, Liv had decided that alcohol was the cure to whatever was happening to her, because she drank more of her whiskey with another grimace that merely masked the pained expression already present on her face. She didn't put the glass back down, staring at what was left of the amber liquid instead, her traits slowly relaxing…never completely, though; her face remained slightly constricted, as she seemed lost in her thoughts.

Olivia still hadn't moved from against the fridge's door when Liv said in a quiet voice: "You know, I get why you're considered to be the victim in this whole 'Switch' situation, but did it ever occur to you that my side of the story isn't all that happy either?"

She could have laughed at that. _Would_ surely have laughed at that, if Liv hadn't looked so dead serious, still staring at the bottom of her glass as if it held some kind of answer. She chose honesty instead. "Are you trying to tell me that walking freely, living my life and deceiving my friends, is somehow comparable to being kidnapped and held captive in a dark cell for eight weeks?"

Liv did chuckle at that; it was a soundless, humorless laugh, a shadow of her usual grin and easy laughter, and she finally turned her eyes away from her whiskey to look at Olivia.

"I hate being here," she admitted then, her voice slightly hoarse.

Olivia held her gaze, darkly, feeling unexpectedly offended by her admission. "Is it that unbearable to be around me?"

Liv actually rolled her eyes at that, briefly pursing one corner of her mouth, like she often did, before bringing her eyes back to Olivia's. "Not everything is about you," she said with a hint of her usual, almost amused derision, since everything was about _them_ right now, literally. "I mean your place. I hate being in your place."

Olivia had to admit that she didn't really know what to answer to that. She simply stared at her, a question mark written all over her face.

Liv sighed, closing her eyes briefly. But she looked at her again when she said: "Just because I believed in what I did for my world, or that I surely would do it all over again, it doesn't mean I _liked_ it." She shook her head slightly. "I don't pride myself on the fact that I spent two months deceiving these people who genuinely care about you. Do you really think I'm that shallow, or that devoid of emotions?"

Olivia wished she could say ' _Yes'_ , right away, without a second of hesitation. A month ago, she surely would have, without a second thought. But things had changed; they were still changing. And as she stared at her Alternate, who looked so atypically grim tonight, with her glass of whiskey, reddened eyes and damp cheeks, she knew that answering positively would be absurd, almost insulting.

"No," she admitted instead, her arms crossing in front of her chest again, part of her hating the fact that she had just yielded.

They stared at each other for another stretch of heavy silence, before Liv continued, her voice still low and serious: "I like being in a control. I like to win. And being here was…" She pursed her lips again, briefly tilting her head. "…challenging, to say the least. Your friends actually came closer to busting my cover more times than you realize. The control I had over this mission was nothing but an illusion I gave myself not to panic." There was another long pause before she spoke again, having averted her eyes to stare down her glass once more. "I am not someone who reacts well to _fear_ , as I'm sure you know. So yeah, I hated being here, being afraid every damn second that my cover would blow and that I would fail my mission, fail my world. And being in your place again, it just brings it all back and it-"

But she abruptly stopped again, displaying every sign of what had happened to her mere minutes ago, her entire being apparently responding to something Olivia couldn't perceive. Whatever that was –and Olivia thought she was starting to know what it could be, it caused her face to constrict again, eyes lost in the distance, until she brought her whiskey up to her lips and tilted her head back to down the rest of it.

After putting the empty glass down on the counter with another loud sound, she spoke again, her voice still hoarse from the alcohol she had just drunk: "So you're right. It doesn't compare to being kidnapped and thrown in a cell. But it wasn't vacation time either."

And on these words, she simply walked away from the counter, leaving the kitchen altogether and going back to the living room. If Olivia had had any way to retreat without having to lay eyes on her again, maybe she would have done just that. But in order for her to go back to her room, she had to go through the living room.

In all honesty, she had no real desire to go back in her bedroom...not alone, anyway, but that was an _entire_ different story, and she was fully blaming the fact that despite it all, she still hadn't exactly calmed down from their little encounter against the fridge. Staying right there in the same spot wasn't helping either.

She finally moved and entered the adjacent room, running a hand through her hair as her eyes fell back on Liv. She had sat back down over the rumpled sheets that covered the dark fabric of her couch, and had one of her hands up to her face again, heel pressed against her eye. She hadn't had nearly enough alcohol to be drunk again, but she was still far from having Olivia's experience and resistance. Olivia wouldn't be surprised if she was experiencing a bit of head rush.

"So, you think you would get off your high horse if I apologized to you or something?" Liv asked then, dropping her hand and raising her head to look up at her.

It was almost shocking to realize that she was being sincere. She also looked hardly convinced at all by her own words, as if she highly doubted that a heartfelt apology would do much, in their case.

Basically, she did not look like someone about to have a moral epiphany.

Olivia couldn't help it. She chuckled softly, not exactly amused, more tired than anything else.

She couldn't ignore the fact that Liv _did_ have a moral code, but it honestly was the oddest kind of code, so different from her own. She had just _admitted_ that she wasn't proud of what she had done, and yet, apologizing for it didn't seem natural to her. It was as unnatural as starting to walk around with the weight of her past mistakes heavy on her shoulders. She kept on moving with that swagger in her steps instead, because to her, no matter the wrongs that had come with her mission, she still believed in her job and in what she had done for her Universe.

She hadn't done it to screw with Olivia's life. Screwing with Olivia's life had been a rather deplorable, ugly ripple that had resulted from the stone that had been thrown in the water.

And Olivia knew that Liv hadn't been the one throwing that stone in the first place.

Standing there in her living room, staring down at her Alternate –who was still waiting to know if she was supposed to apologize or not, Olivia suddenly realized that she had tortured herself way too long about it all, and that maybe it was time for her to move on a little.

And so she shrugged slightly, answering her in all honesty: "You know, I think you just did. Sort of."

Liv held her gaze, in a long stare that soon had Olivia's fingertips tingling again, and she stared back as a smirk slowly pulled at the corner of her double's lips. Liv fell back against the back of the couch then, or rather _slouched_ against it, one elbow up and pressed into the pad so she could lean her cheek against her fist, while she brought her legs up, sliding one of them under herself while she bent the other in front of her, in a fairly indecent posture.

Once again, she seemed to have gone back to feeling completely unbothered, apparently more interested in piercing Olivia with her eyes rather than continuing reminiscing about serious matters. But her smile became a bit apologetic then, and soon, she started nibbling on the nail of her thumb, before she spoke again:

"You know, since I'm being exceedingly and embarrassingly honest tonight, I might as well come clean about something else."

Olivia, who still hadn't moved, her feet pretty much glued to the ground, raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Liv stopped nibbling on her nail, dropping her hand and shrugging a shoulder. "I told you last month that I wouldn't play any more games with you, but…you were right about one thing. I did ignore you on purpose today. I wanted to see how much of it it would take before you…snapped."

Olivia knew that she was not imagining the return of the crackling statics in the room; there was something about the way Liv simply _stared_ at her that was beyond unnerving. That kind of stare was what had started it all, weeks ago, and Olivia was more powerless than ever at that instant, especially when she had just been told that the way she had been ignored all day had been nothing more than another ruse.

Maybe she would have felt mad about it if she hadn't been too busy feeling the oddest kind of relief. And maybe she could be honest towards Liv too, and tell her just how efficient her little game had actually been, or how she didn't doubt that she would have snapped sooner rather than later, had she kept at it.

But Olivia also knew that despite the slow liquefaction of her bones, due to that endless stare, she still was the one in control, here; she wasn't ready to surrender her power just yet.

"Is it what all the obnoxious flirting with Lincoln was about?" She asked instead, wrinkling her nose. "Were you seriously hoping I would get jealous or something?" This sounded ridiculous even to her own ears, and she wasn't surprised in the least when it caused Liv to snort loudly.

"Geez, no," she laughed, shaking her head. " _That_ was because of a stupid bet I made with my Lincoln. He wanted to know how many times I could get your guy to push his glasses back up his nose on the first day. Apparently, _my_ guy used to do that a lot in High School whenever pretty girls talked to him."

Genuinely amused by this revelation, Olivia had to ask. "How many times?"

Liv smiled with pride, briefly biting down her lip before admitting: "I stopped counting after the first two hundred times."

Olivia couldn't help it. She laughed, not a small chuckle, but an honest laugh this time, briefly closing her eyes as she smiled. Not for the first time, she thought about how intriguing it was, to see just how different and distinct the dynamics were between the Olivia Dunham and Lincoln Lee of each universe. She liked her Lincoln, he was a good man, a good agent and at times, he seemed to really understand her. But she couldn't for the life of her imagine herself joking around with him with so much ease, the way Liv was constantly doing with the other Agent Lee.

She reopened her eyes, about to comment on this, but the words never left her mouth, as she found herself entrapped once more into Liv's gaze. Her expression had changed, somehow, her head now tilted to the side as she stared at Olivia with blunt intensity, causing a shiver to run right up her spine, and her own smile faltered.

"What?" She found herself asking, even though it was pointless.

She knew Liv enjoyed seeing her react to that kind of look, the woman had admitted it herself. Plus, it wasn't like they didn't have a very valid explanation for the heavy tension that kept on growing steadily between them; it was becoming very clear that none of them had actually forgotten anything about what happened last month.

They both remembered everything clearly.

Once again, Liv surprised her by answering her question in all honesty. "You were smiling."

Olivia had already been blushing for a while, the warmth on her face almost a familiar companion now, whenever she found herself in Liv's proximity for more than a few minutes...and the extended heat that had settled there a few minutes ago in the kitchen hadn't gone anywhere. Yet, she knew right away that the color had just darkened on her cheeks upon hearing Liv's answer, more than her face warming up, to be honest.

For reasons she didn't fully understand, she was feelings almost self-conscious, now, shrugging a bit awkwardly and wrapping her arms even more tightly around herself, lips pursed in a small smirk. "I _do_ smile, you know," she said, trying –and failing, to sound casual and amused. "It's not exclusive to you."

Even though she was smiling softly, almost mysteriously, Liv's gaze remained serious and intense as she shook her head. "Not around me, you don't," she replied simply.

Olivia's brilliant brain brought back another memory then, suddenly, almost unexpectedly, as she remembered vividly how she had stood in front of that mirror in her hotel room, with Liv body pressed behind hers, her hands splayed over her body and skin, her hot breath burning the side of her neck.

 _"What do you want from me?"_ Olivia had asked, as she desperately tried to get her mind to take control of her body again.

 _"I don't want anything from you."_ Liv had answered. _"Though I won't lie, I would like to see what a real smile looks like on you, sometimes."_

Right now, a few feet separated Olivia from the place where Liv was sitting on the couch, with her arms loosely wrapped around her bent leg, their postures once again the complete opposite of each other, as Olivia was still hugging herself almost in a death grip, her heart pounding beneath her ribs. But the distance seemed almost irrelevant at that instant; her body was awake and shivering, the strength of these memories blending with the intensity of the moment.

Olivia was stubborn, though. She was stubborn, and still more than a little confused by the fact that she seemed unable to fight the very real attraction that existed between her and her Alternate.

And so she used that upper hand she still possessed, choosing to press on a sensitive matter again when she said gravely: "Well, _you_ don't usually cry around me either. What was that about?"

The change was instantaneous.

She saw Liv's entire body tense briefly, the way she was hugging her leg suddenly resembling Olivia's stance, and she averted her eyes almost hastily, all traces of her small smile gone from her face. "Of course you would go there…" she muttered unhappily, her eyes now fixed on a random point in space.

Truth be told, if Olivia had asked this knowing that it would give her a break from the smothering tension surrounding them, she had also done so hoping for an answer. She felt truly puzzled by her Alternate's strange display of vulnerability, which was so different from the way she usually behaved. Plus, she couldn't deny the fact that seeing her that upset had affected her in some ways.

Olivia wanted answers, and she wanted them now; judging by the conversation they'd had so far, she might actually get a few tonight, as Liv had obviously let her guard down around her, willingly or not, it didn't matter.

It was for all these reasons that Olivia walked closer to the couch, to finally take a seat on the coffee table, right in front of her, telling herself that it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that she was now physically much closer to Liv. Liv, who was still resolutely avoiding her eyes, looking rather grumpy now, as if she was very disappointed by how the mood had changed.

"C'mon…" Olivia said softly; both her hands had come down to grip the table on each side of her. "I am willing to believe that being back in my place makes you feel uncomfortable, but you've also been pretty clear about the fact that ultimately, you're not losing sleep over this. So what is it?"

Being indeed much closer to her now, Olivia could see her face more clearly, even though the light was still very dim around them, the only source of light coming from the kitchen. She could tell she was biting the inside of her lip, her face now slightly constricted, her breathing definitely shallower. She still refused to meet her eyes, though, and she was staring in the distance when she spoke in a whisper, shaking her head almost imperceptibly.

"It doesn't matter. It's not real."

One thing for sure, whatever pain she was experiencing was real.

It was real enough to ooze out of her and set off Olivia's natural ability for empathy, tuning to her in a way that was almost eerie, suddenly sharing more than a little of her inexplicable melancholy.

She remembered more than the physical aspect of their night together. She remembered just as vividly what Liv had told her, when Olivia had confronted her about what had brought her to her hotel room in the first place.

"Is it…the baby again?" She asked then, cautiously.

Liv did not need to answer. Her entire body did it for her, her leg now pressed against her chest in something close to a fetal position, and she closed her eyes, a pained mask contracting her every trait.

"You still hear the cries?" Olivia insisted, her voice low and soft; she wasn't doing this to make her misery worse. She wanted to understand, not just out of curiosity anymore. Something in her wanted to help her somehow, maybe.

Liv had reopened her eyes, but she was not looking at her, gazing in the distance again, and Olivia watched as her eyes grew more and more glassy; it was as if she was hearing these cries right now.

And maybe she was.

"It's a boy, you know…" Liv murmured, then. But as soon as the words escaped her lips, she had to close her eyes shut again, as if it had caused her physical pain, judging by the grimace deforming her traits, and two wet trails instantly traced their way down her cheeks.

She took a loud and raspy breath, obviously trying to get a grip before it got worse, letting her body unfold, both her legs falling back in front of her, her knees brushing Olivia's as she leaned forward, one of her arms now wrapped around herself while she used her other hand to wipe her face.

"This doesn't make any sense…" she said, her voice hoarse, sounding more aggravated than anything else as she shook her head; she was still avoiding Olivia's eyes, despite the fact that their faces were now very close, Olivia having mirrored her almost unconsciously, leaning forward as well. "This…this isn't like me. I don't get _weepy_. But this baby boy, I keep hearing him cry, and he keeps popping up in my dreams and it just…" More tears were rolling down her face, tears that she kept brushing off with annoyed fingers. "Honestly, it feels like a very bad case of PMS, my hormones are all over the place."

Up until know, Olivia had been thinking about how the last time they had talked about this, Liv had said it had started after the creation of the Bridge…which was when her own dreams had started. She couldn't get out of her mind the idea that maybe, just maybe, that mysterious child Liv was obviously grieving was linked to _her_ mysterious man, for whom she so often longed for. But Liv's last comment about hormones put another thought into her head, one that was just as equally odd, but still preferable to the both of them sharing this strange bond over a man that did not even exist. She hadn't forgotten either how they tended to appear together in her dreams lately, but that was a completely different matter.

"Could it be your body telling you that…you're…pregnant, maybe?" She asked, then, feeling a bit ridiculous saying these words.

Liv finally raised her head and met her eyes, wiping her nose and letting out a tired chuckle with a shake of her head. "Hardly. For one thing, Frank has been away for almost three months now, so I had a few proofs that I'm not pregnant. And despite what you think, I really don't go around sleeping with people. And when I exceptionally do, I doubt pregnancy could be an outcome."

They were very, very close, Olivia thought then. They were so close that if she extended her hands a little, she could grab hers…bring her hands to her face, maybe, wipe her tears. That was why she was still holding onto the edge of the table, the urge to reach out for her becoming almost overpowering as Liv's gleaming eyes bore into hers.

"I'm sorry," Olivia said softly, her heart beating too fast again. "I shouldn't have implied that you like to sleep around."

Liv actually smiled at that, shaking her head slowly, shrugging almost in indifference. "Now see, _you_ apologize way too much. There is some truth in what you said, you know. I do act like a bitch on occasions. What you need to understand though is that I'm aware of it, and that I don't care."

Close as they were, staring at each other the way they were, Olivia knew that she meant it. She honestly, truthfully, did not care.

And not for the first time, Olivia found herself torn between moral disapproval and selfish envy. Whether she liked it or not, she couldn't deny the fact that sometimes, she wished she could go around so blithely.

Maybe that was why she felt that inexplicable pull toward her; if she got close enough, maybe, just maybe, she would understand what made her this way, understand how she could still have tears glistening on her cheeks, and yet give her a look that told her she was doing fine, all the time.

Liv was fire, and Olivia felt like the proverbial moth drawn to the flame. She knew there was danger, there, that she would warm up, and that she would burn. But part of her wanted to burn.

And if Liv's gaze was telling her anything right now, it was that she would gladly oblige.

"You know, as much as I hate to admit it, your little game today was working," Olivia found herself saying.

It was Liv's turn to raise an eyebrow, even though she was already smirking knowingly. "Oh?"

Olivia shrugged, a bit embarrassed. "I just thought…I thought you'd simply gotten bored with me. Which would have made sense, really."

Liv shook her head very slowly, losing her smile. "See, that's why it was a stupid game. I'm most definitely not bored with you."

That pull Olivia felt was definitely stronger than ever now, pulsing relentlessly, really, somewhere low inside of her, and she knew she couldn't ignore it anymore, let alone fight it.

But as if on a cue, Liv's face changed then, once again going from intently focused to lost and pained. Her eyes drifted away, before she closed them altogether, dropping her head and pressing both her palms against her eyelids with an unhappy growl.

Olivia didn't need to ask; she knew what was happening.

She also knew that she was not going to simply sit there and watch her go through this again without doing anything. Maybe she should; maybe a lesser person would, as some kind of revenge. But Olivia was still tuned to her, and she couldn't bear it; she needed this to stop, for her sake as much as her Alternate's. She might not understand it, or know how to resolve it.

But there always was the temporary fix.

She barely gave it a second thought.

She finally let go of the table, the wood having left its mark on the flesh of her fingers and palms; that's how hard she had been holding onto it, trying to stop herself from doing what she was doing now.

Without a word, she put both her hands on Liv's shoulders, pushing her against the back of the couch as she left the table. At the feel of Olivia's touch, Liv immediately dropped her hands and reopened her eyes, and she offered her a genuinely surprised look as Olivia then swiftly pinned her against the couch, straddling her firmly, not quite able to keep in the sigh that rushed out of her lips when Liv's hands instinctively fell on her hips and her own fingers gripped the pad of the couch behind her. There definitely was more than shock in Liv's eyes now, the way her chest was suddenly heaving a little was proof enough.

"What are you doing?" Liv asked her, her voice once again hoarse, but definitely not for the same reason. She looked honestly bewildered.

Olivia's entire body seemed to be humming at her proximity, as she was finally yielding to that aching hunger that had slowly been driving her insane days after days. Amazingly, it didn't feel like she was being defeated this time, though. She felt in control; this was her own doing, and the surprise on Liv's face was only accentuating this powerful feeling.

Using her grip on the couch, she pulled herself definitely closer, until their faces were only inches apart, and she whispered against her lips: "I'm distracting you."

When Liv's hands reached up, then, one of them cupping her cheek while the other instantly disappeared in her hair, Olivia almost sighed in relief again, leaning down to erase the distance that existed between their lips…but as it turned out, Liv didn't use her hold on her to bring her closer, like she had expected. She stopped her instead, opposing some definite resistance, keeping their faces apart.

"Wait," she said, almost in a rush, and Olivia did halt her movement, pulling away slightly to get a better look at her.

She frowned, as it was her turn to feel more than a little bemused. " _Wait_?" She repeated, highly skeptical. "Are you kidding me?"

Just like her, Liv's breathing was most definitely shallower now, the skin of her cheeks, still wet with tears, having reddened, and even though she had been the one stopping her, she was also making sure that she wouldn't pull away too much, keeping their faces torturously close, and yet not close enough.

Liv shook her head almost imperceptibly, unable to keep her eyes from regularly darting down to her lips. "Don't get me wrong, I have no doubt that you can distract me just fine, but to be honest with you, what I'm not looking forward to is what comes next, when you freak out on me and suddenly decide that this is the worst thing you could have ever done."

"Now who's the one over-thinking it?" She asked, tensing against her, mostly out of frustration and slight embarrassment, _again_ , feeling more than a bit foolish at that instant. She instinctively tried to pull away some more, but Liv's grip on her face tightened, her other hand having left her hair to splay over the back of her shirt.

"I know why you're doing this," Liv whispered, her eyes too intense. "You have a thing for damaged people, that's why you're suddenly so much more confident and direct with me. But you and I both know that this…this isn't who I am most of the time. And I could be spared being treated like a bitch tomorrow morning when you start having regrets."

"I thought you didn't care," Olivia almost grumbled, not liking the way this was going, especially since there definitely was truth in her words. But for Christ's Sake, she was _straddling_ her and basically offering herself to her, she definitely needed to stop talking now.

"I don't care when I know I'm acting like a bitch," Liv said instead, apparently decided on continuing their little therapy talk. "It's another thing altogether to feel wanted, and then be rejected depending on your mood." She shook her head, her thumb softly brushing the corner of her lips. "I'm not asking you for anything. So don't make it all sound like I cornered you into this, or that I-"

But Olivia's hands had let go of the couch, now, coming up to grab her face instead so she could pull her forward as she herself leaned in. She shut her up by planting a firm kiss on her lips, simultaneously rolling her hips into hers in a slow but resolute movement, which caused Liv to let out a raspy breath against her lips, her fingers digging into the fabric of Olivia's shirt over her back, instinctively trying to bring her closer.

"You were right," Olivia breathed out against her mouth, then, with a definite hint of irritation, before nibbling slightly on Liv's bottom lip. Shivers shot deliciously through her entire body as she let her fingers slid from her damp cheeks, threading them through the silky mass of her hair. "Over-thinking things leads us nowhere. So now shut up and kiss me."

Liv didn't need much more prodding, her body arching off the couch before Olivia was even done talking, and their lips soon met again. It was a slow meeting, and yet it was definitely fervent and famished, their bodies swaying against one another to the matching beat of their pulsing hearts. Hands moved, too, in an attempt to increase their proximity as the kiss quickly intensified and tongues joined the battle their lips were already fighting; Olivia reveled in the taste of her, a unique flavor tinged with the familiar hint of a liquor she was very fond of; all of her senses were being attacked again, taste and smell and _touch_. Before she knew it, Liv's fingers had slipped under her shirt, her palms pressing firmly into her back, before she let her cool fingertips trace their way up her bare skin, embracing her closely, inducing shivers and goose bumps, as well as sighs and a world that spun behind her close eyelids.

Under her touch, against her lips and into her arms, Olivia was slowly burning, the sensation almost indecent in its delight; she had kept this fire trapped for the last few weeks, and now, she was letting it run free at last, free to consume her whole in a unhurried and yet steady pace.

Once again, Olivia was quickly losing control; she was nothing but malleable flesh in these expert hands, her caresses soft, yet striving, and it wasn't long at all before Liv halted their heated kissing to grab the hem of her shirt, swiftly pulling it up over her head. Olivia wanted to protest, briefly remembering that she had wanted to be the one in charge this time, but any objection she might have had promptly dissolved away when Liv strategically splayed her hands upon her back again and _pressed_. She arched into her touch, even more so when she swiftly latched onto her breast, and her lips and tongue repeated what they had been doing to her mouth only moments ago; Olivia's sighs turned into low moans as the warmth spread mercilessly. She was more than arching under her ministration now, her head thrown back so far that, had she been able to think clearly, she might have wondered how they hadn't crashed upon the coffee table yet. She held onto Liv's head, fingers lost into her hair, for balance as much as for closeness, making sure this torturous mouth of hers wouldn't go anywhere.

Olivia was soon using that grip on her to let her know that she should come back farther up again, though, pulling not so gently on her hair; she obliged without much resistance, taking her time, scattering languid kisses all over her neck and jaw. But none of them was as languid as the one they shared when their lips met again. Olivia pressed forward, using her weight to pin Liv back against the couch, then moving strategically, adjusting herself over her lap to gain more access; her head still felt delectably cloudy, but she also felt the renewed strong desire to take the lead. She needed to touch her, too, not to simply be touched. She vibrantly remembered how good it had felt that night, to forget everything else as she melted into her caresses. It had been liberating, truly, and giving the current circumstances, she thought it was time for her to give back.

After all, she was merely looking out for herself.

Mimicking Liv's earlier move, she slipped a hand under her shirt, letting her fingernails graze lightly over the soft skin of her chest, feeling the muscles twitch beneath her fingertips; when she fully cupped the warm flesh of her breast and squeezed it approvingly, almost curiously, she rapidly decided that she definitely enjoyed the feeling; she especially loved the way Liv was reacting to her touch, sighing into her mouth, and Olivia massaged her to the pace of their undulating hips, cataloguing each reaction to her every move.

Before long, Liv was almost wriggling again, though, obviously trying to get the upper hand back, attempting to pull herself off the couch. But Olivia pinched her pebble nipple between her fingers, not hard enough to hurt her, but hard enough to make her react alright; it successfully put an end to her fighting as she fell back against the couch and groaned into her mouth, her fingers twisting in her hair a bit roughly in response. Olivia could be swift, too, and she proved it by getting her out of her shirt within the next few seconds. Before Liv could get a chance to attempt anything again, Olivia tightened the grip of her thighs around her, quickly spinning them over the couch until Liv found herself lying down upon it, head pressed into the pillow she had used to sleep earlier.

Olivia felt unstoppable, now, feeling more than a little emboldened by how, despite the fact that she still didn't really have a clue what she was doing, she was being obviously successful in distracting Liv. She was not even trying to fight anymore at that instant, her cheeks a delicious shade of dark pink, her eyes hazy with desire as she panted slightly beneath her, just as intoxicated as her by the feel of their bare chests meeting and rubbing with every slight shift of their bodies. Olivia focused on Liv's neck, next, tracing the tense, pulsing line with a slow and teasing tongue, once again taking note of how she responded to her, judging by what made her tighten her grip on her hair, what made her pull, or what caused her fingernails to scrap her scalp, unambiguous in their longing, but never too roughly.

Olivia let her hand travel down, then, not even stopping briefly before she grabbed the hem of her pants and started pulling down. Even though Liv instinctively moved beneath her, trying to help her out, discarding the item using only one hand turned out to be trickier than she first thought; Olivia almost grunted in frustration as she detached herself from Liv's neck to bring her second hand into action, finally managing to get rid of the annoying piece of clothing, _definitely_ roughly. Satisfied –and yet nothing but satisfied at that instant, she leaned back over Liv, who was now smiling rather mischievously as she reached up for Olivia's face again, fingers disappearing into the cascade of blond hair falling all around her head, pulling her down.

"My, you're really on fire tonight," she whispered against Olivia's mouth, and she felt her smile before Liv started nibbling the plump and swollen flesh of her bottom lip.

Olivia felt the fleeting urge to let her know that the fire she was talking about wouldn't be here if it weren't for her; it had been so long since she had felt so bold with someone, in such intimate ways, feeling like she was burning up indeed, every new meeting of their skins, just as equally feverish now, increasing her hunger and desire to watch _her_ squirm. But she quickly realized that she didn't want to talk at all, not anymore, and she didn't want Liv to talk either. She was more interested and intrigued in finding out what she could do to make her shut up for good. Without a single word, she recaptured her lips, then, heatedly, leaving no doubt about her intentions.

She had to break the kiss when she felt Liv hands travel down over her spine, though, as she soon tried to get her out of her pants, too. But Olivia did not approve; she knew just how sneaky these hands could be, and she was well decided on keeping the lead for the time being. And so she moved again, grabbing both of her wrists and pinning them above her head, which caused Liv to smirk again, obviously understanding Olivia's plan, but being as equally resolute in her desire to fight back, already trying to escape from her grip.

But both her resistance and her smirk promptly dissolved away when Olivia used the thigh she had slipped between Liv's legs, bringing it definitely higher. She pressed firmly against that warm place, instantly eliciting a melodic hum from Liv as she clenched her fists closed and bit down her lip, her hips rolling again, trying to increase the pressure Olivia was applying, a little bit harder every time she slithered upon her.

"No fighting back…" she murmured against her parted lips, loving how burning Liv's breath felt on her face. "It's your turn this time."

Liv caught her bottom lip between her teeth again, biting just hard enough. "We could team up, you know…" she said, or rather sighed, her hands wriggling again within Olivia's grasp. "You obviously need some relaxing, too."

Her eyes were so dark with desire and pleasure, Olivia wasn't sure if what she felt was her own rush, or a mere projection from Liv's entire body language. It surely was a bit of both. The throbbing she felt, deep and low within herself, was definitely aching now, demanding, and part of her just begged her to gave in and let Liv touch her…but she was enjoying being the one _on top_ way too much.

Plus, the night was still young….sort of.

Olivia shook her head, then, moving her leg up and down once again against her burning core until she got Liv to bite her lip again with a muffled moan. "I like working on my own…" she said teasingly, yet categorically, and this actually caused Liv to chuckle against her mouth.

"You like working on _yourself_ , you mean."

Olivia abruptly increased the pressure as she let go of her wrists, bringing one of her hands down to her breast again, kneading and pinching, causing Liv's face to constrict, eyes now tightly closed. "You really need to learn when to shut up," she whispered in her ear, before she started sucking at her pulsing point.

Liv was shuddering beneath her, her free hands on the move again, raking her skin with her fingernails. She soon encircled her tightly in her arms, though, so tightly, her fingers digging into her back and into her hair as she rippled against her. With her mouth so close to Olivia's ear, each and every one of her soft and low moans resonated into her head, adding fuel to the fire already consuming her insides.

"Take your pants off…" Liv breathed out into her ear, then, almost pleadingly. "I want to feel you…" She punctuated her request by dropping her hands to her waist, grabbing her hips tightly, adding force to their next sway and pinning Olivia more firmly against her, causing her to swallow back a moan of her own; she had to admit that the fabric between them was getting more than a little annoying. And then Liv panted out the word that made up her mind. "Please…"

Olivia was as swift as humanly possible given her state, and soon, that last piece of clothing had fallen somewhere onto the ground with the rest of their clothes. Before long, she was leaning down over Liv again, and she paid the price for having yielded to her plea. She found herself intoxicated, entrapped between her limbs and warmth. Everything was skin and everything was scent and sensations, Liv's legs locked around her, her hands travelling, caressing, massaging, her scorching mouth and tongue trailing kisses alongside Olivia's jaw as their hips grinded and their bodies met, rippling and dancing in perfect synch again.

With the music of her drumming heart pulsing against her ears and deep within, the most enticing drug coursing through her veins, Olivia somehow managed to push herself up just enough, relying entirely on her most primal instincts as they directed her moves; she let her hand wander down, down between their bodies, nothing but an inch of heated air separating their skin, and her wide and hazy eyes locked with Liv's as her fingers slid through wetness and warmth. Tremors and melodious moans followed, from one woman to the other, Olivia responding just as keenly to the feel of her, dazed by it all. Liv reached out for her again, grabbing her face to pull her down into another longing kiss, and their tongues followed the rhythm of Olivia's hand, as she teased the small bundle of nerves she had swiftly found there. Encouraged by her responses, she quickly intensified her caress, causing Liv to abruptly let get of her lips with a resonating moan when Olivia's fingers slid inside of her, her head thrown back deep into the pillow as she arched beneath her.

Olivia resembled rippling waters over her, never still, undulating steadily, her sound movements adding momentum to her strokes. She kept on scattering languorous and scorching love marks on every bit of exposed skin her lips could easily reach, acutely aware of Liv's hands as they went back to massaging her breasts, blurring her perception with dazzling light on more than one occasion, letting herself momentarily drown into the misty warmth. It wasn't long before Liv became far too consumed by the impetus growing fast within her to be able to do anything but merely react to Olivia's touch, clinging to her rather than caressing, her movements focused on bringing her closer, while Olivia focused on bringing _her_ closer, and closer, and closer…

Even through cloudy eyes and foggy brain, Olivia couldn't help but stare, thinking without even an ounce of vanity that she was beautiful, with that vibrant halo of hair spread all around her head, her skin having reddened too with the assault of the swelling heat within her flesh, through every inch of her, resulting in a thin layer of perspiration that covered Olivia's skin, too; her tears had gone at last, and judging by the exquisite relief that constricted every trait of her face, so had the distant cries.

She was beautiful, as her released neared faster, and faster, and _faster_ , and the sounds Olivia was educing from her were beautiful, too. She understood, now. She understood what Liv had found so enticing in getting these reactions out of her, the previous month.

It was both mesmerizing and empowering.

Olivia never relented the rhythm of her caresses, both from her curling fingers and hungry lips, as well as from the rest of her entire shivering body, still seeking hers with their every move; she might not be as far gone or inexorably enthralled as the quivering woman beneath her, her high wasn't any less real or overwhelming. And when Liv finally came undone against her, in a powerful rush of rippling shudders and moans, she swore she almost saw stars, too.

Nestling her face in the damp crook of her neck, Olivia placed soft kisses against her pulsing point, tasting the salt of her skin again, and feeling the galloping tempo of her heart under her lips, as she gradually came back down with loud and hectic intakes of breath.

Given her obviously drained state, Olivia did not expect her next move at all…which is undoubtedly why Liv was so successful on her first attempt.

Without giving Olivia the slightest fighting chance, Liv locked her legs firmly around her waist again, spinning them around with incredible dexterity. Before she could even start to process the sudden change of position, Liv had attacked her breasts again, cupping one with a warm palm while her mouth focused on the other, lips, teeth and tongue assaulting her nipple.

That pulsating heat that did not have any time at all to lessen in the least abruptly expended, and positively exploded when Liv fervently grinded her hips down to hers, causing Olivia's hands to shoot up behind her head to cling to the edge of the couch as she instantly arched into her touch, her turn to moan loudly. And she had no doubt whatsoever that all Liv would have to do was keep on using her tongue on her breast the way she was now as she kept on moving over her relentlessly, and she would come crashing down spectacularly soon enough. But unsurprisingly, it wasn't nearly enough for the daring redhead who was evidently well decided on giving back properly.

Olivia was nothing but a puppet made of raw nerves beneath her, and god she knew what string to pull. Without giving her another moment to react yet again, her head still thrown back with her eyes tightly closed, she felt Liv move away, before she found herself being pulled rather firmly. Her entire body moved forward, towards the other edge of the couch, forcing her to let go of the one she had been holding on to. She reopened her eyes and raised her head just long enough to see that Liv had most definitely climbed down the couch, having strategically settled herself between her legs, which she was already placing over her shoulders. The last coherent thought that crossed Olivia's mind was ' _Shit',_ before Liv'stongue began working on her again, shutting her brain down most effectively.

As she completely and wholeheartedly surrendered to the fire now roaring and burning for miles and miles around it seemed, her hands entangled in the silkiest of flames, it did occur to Olivia –very, very briefly, that she was, in fact, reenacting the dream she'd had less than twenty-four hours ago.

Except that there was no ghost of a man in this reality, only the very tangible feel of the woman entrapped between her legs, breaking her down so absolutely and effortlessly with her fingers and her tongue, and that was quite alright, truly.

The other noticeable difference was that, this time around, there was no abrupt awakening, no sudden end that would leave her aching with frustration. This time around, Olivia let herself go with no restraint. She let the warmth burn her whole, burn her every cell, her every thought, as blinding pleasure annihilated everything else, and her entire being shook with the force of her breathtaking release.

As it turned out, she might have blacked out for a moment, there, because when she reopened her eyes what seemed to be a mere second later, her chest still heaving ridiculously fast, Liv was hovering over her again, definitely back on the couch. There was a tired but very satisfied smirk tugging at the corner of her lips.

"Scooch up," she told her softly, and Olivia realized then that Liv had rested one of her hands on her cheek, the gesture almost tender.

Having officially lost the capacity to use her brain for the time being, Olivia could only obey, feebly managing to move back up the couch, her limbs still trembling in the aftermath of that one earth-shattering orgasm she wouldn't forget any time soon. As she came to lie on her side, her back pressed against the back of the couch, Liv slithered next to her, having grabbed the sheet in the mean time. She threw it over their cooling forms, shielding them from the cold already settling around them.

Her couch definitely wasn't made for two people to sleep on, but they managed it just fine, limbs entangling again, reducing space and sharing body warmth, along with a few stares filled with unspoken words, before sleep finally took over.

For the first time in weeks, they both slept soundly.


End file.
